ELIZABETH  MYERS 


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THE  SOCIAL  LETTER 


THE  SOCIAL  LETTER 


BY 

ELIZABETH  MYERS 


NEW  YORK 

BRENTANO'S 

MCMXVIII 


Copyright,  1918 
BY  BRENTANOS 


THE  UNIVERSITY  PRESS,  CAMBRIDGE,  U.  S.  A. 


PREFACE 

THIS  book  is  written  not  in  the  belief  that 
the  information  contained  therein  is  un- 
familiar to  the  majority  of  its  readers,  but  with 
the  knowledge  that,  in  our  scurrying  along  to 
keep  up  with  time,  we  have  neglected  the  epis- 
tolary pen  and  resorted  to  means  more  rapid 
to  express  our  thoughts.  In  the  capsule  forms 
of  telegram,  cable  and  other  means,  the  art  of 
graceful  expression  must  necessarily  be  thrown 
in  the  discard. 

Letter-writing  to-day  is  a  lost  art.  We  have 
no  modern  Madame  de  Sevigne  to  stand  im- 
mortal through  her  gift  of  correspondence.  We 
no  longer  embroider  with  pretty  words.  The 
cavalier  of  the  pen  lies  moldering  in  his  frills 
and  satin  knee-breeches. 

Yet  now  and  again  we  are  faced  with  a  task 
that  demands  the  taking  up  of  our  pen  upon 
some  social  occasion.  Immediately  what  should 
be  a  joy  becomes  a  bugbear.  It  remains  to  be 
done,  however,  for  courtesy  and  good-breeding 
stand  inexorable  sentinels.  We  know  well 


2023872 


PREFACE 

enough  what  it  is  we  should  say,  but  just  how 
to  say  it,  makes  us  pause  and  question. 

I  have,  therefore,  endeavored  to  place  a  few 
stepping-stones  in  the  rushing  river  of  social 
obligations;  not  only  for  those  who  need  merely 
a  gentle  reminder  to  speed  them  on,  but  for  the 
debutante,  suddenly  confronted  with  the  de- 
mands that  must  come  with  her  entrance  into 
the  social  world. 

If  I  have  accomplished  this  I  shall  feel  that 
my  efforts  have  not  been  in  vain. 

THE  AUTHOR. 


[  vi  ] 


CONTENTS 

CHAPTER  I  —  INTRODUCTION  PAGE 

Function  of  social  letter I 

Brevity 2 

Simplicity  of  form  and  language 3 

Forms 3 

Formal  notes 3 

Informal  notes 5 

Forms  of  address 5 

In  closing 6 

Ending  the  letter 7 

Abbreviation 8 

Stationery  etiquette 9 

The  letter-sheet 10 

Envelopes 10 

Monograms  —  crests      1 1 

Addressing  and  dating 12 

The  opening  paragraph      14 

Punctuation 14 

Appearance  of  letter 15 

Chirography 15 

Addressing  envelope 15 

Elimination  of  the  ego 18 

Psychological  effect  of  letter 19- 

Answering  a  letter 20 

The  note  with  a  message 20 

Don'ts 21 

[  vii   ] 


CONTENTS 

CHAPTER  II -THE  INVITATION  PAGE 

When  to  answer  an  invitation 23 

The  definite  reply 23 

To  whom  to  address  invitation 24 

To  whom  to  address  reply 25 

For  club  invitation 25 

Visiting  card 26 

Engraved  invitation 26 

Afternoon  affairs 26 

Invitation  through  daughter 26 

Leaving  visiting  cards 27 

Details  to  be  considered 27 


DINNERS 

Invitations,  formal 28 

Invitations,  formal,  engraved 28 

Acceptance,  formal 29 

Regret,  formal 29 

Special  purpose  invitation 30 

Special  purpose  acceptance     31 

Special  purpose  regret 31 

Invitation  for  place  other  than  home      ....  32 

Acceptance 32 

Regret 32 

Informal  invitation 33 

Informal  acceptance 33 

Informal  regret 33 

Daughter  of  house,  invitation 34 

Daughter  of  house,  acceptance 34 

Daughter  of  house,  regret 34 

Including  opera,  etc 35 

Including  opera,  etc.,  acceptance 36 

Including  opera,  etc.,  regret      36 

[  viii  ] 


CONTENTS 


LUNCHEONS 

PAGE 

Formal  invitation  "to  meet,"  etc  

37 

Formal  invitation  "to  meet,"  etc.,  acceptance 

37 

Formal  invitation  "to  meet,"  etc.,  regret  .    .    . 

38 

Informal  invitation     

38 

Informal  acceptance   

39 

Informal  regret    

39 

Informal  theatre,  opera,  party,  etc  

39 

Informal  theatre,  opera,  etc.,  acceptance    .    .    . 

40 

Informal  theatre,  opera,  etc.,  regret     

40 

WEDDINGS 

Formal  invitation    

4i 

Formal  invitation,  engraved      

42 

Home  wedding 

A  A 

Wedding  breakfast      

TT" 

44 

Acceptance,  formal     

45 

Regret,  formal     

46 

Informal  wedding    

46 

Informal  wedding  invitation  

46 

Informal  wedding  acceptance    

47 

Informal  wedding  regret    

47 

Wedding  announcements   

47 

Announcements  

48 

Second  marriage      

48 

Recalling  invitations  

49 

BALLS 

Invitation     

50 

Acceptance  

Si 

Regret   

C2 

Informal  dance    

j 
52 

Visiting  card  invitation      

S3 

Acceptance,  informal  

53 

Regret,  informal  

54 

[  ix  ] 

CONTENTS 

RECEPTIONS  — AT  HOMES  PAGE 

Acceptance  .    .    .  ".    *   „  • 55 

Regret 55 


CLUBS  AND  SOCIETIES 

Invitation 39 

Acceptance ."....' 57 

Regret 57 


GARDEN  PARTIES 

House  or  week-end  parties 41 

Invitations 59 

Acceptance , 60 

Regret 61 

"  Bread-and-butter  letter " 61 

Reminder      63 

Canceling  invitation 65 

Formal      65 

Informal 65 

Breaking  an  engagement 66 

Invitation  to  "shower" 67 

Acceptance 67 

Regret ".    .    .    .  67 


CHILDREN'S  PARTIES 

Invitation 68 

Acceptance 69 

Regret 69 

Invitation  to  stranger 48 

Request 70 

Acceptance 70 

Regret       .    .    .- 70 

[x] 


CONTENTS 

CHAPTER  III  —  THE  LETTER  OF  THANKS  PAGE 

The  cheerful  receiver      72 

Bride's  note  for  wedding  gift 72 

Acknowledgment 73 

CHRISTMAS  GIFTS 

From  employee  to  employer 76 

To  acquaintance      77 

To  benefactor 78 

BIRTHDAY  LETTER 79 

WEDDING  ANNIVERSARIES 80 

On  fifth  year 81 

For  a  longer  period 81 

FOR  FAVOR  RECEIVED 82 

GIFT  TO  BABY 83 

Acknowledging  gift  for  child 84 

CHAPTER    IV  — THE    LETTER    OF  CONGRATU- 
LATION 

Letter  to  engaged  girl 86 

Man  to  engaged  friend 87 

For  honorary  distinction 88 

Birthday  letter 89 

From  man  to  girl  on  birthday 90 

On  wedding  anniversary 90 

Upon  recovery  from  an  illness      91 

CHAPTER  V  — THE  LETTER  OF  CONDOLENCE 

Stationery 95 

Acknowledgment,  formal  card 95 

Acknowledgment,  informal 96 


CONTENTS 

.  PAGE 

Letter  upon  death  of  close  relative      98 

Letter  upon  death  of  distant  relative      ....  100 

Letter  upon  death  of  friend 100 

On  material  loss  —  loss  of  animal  (pet)  ....  100 

On  soldier  lost  in  battle 101 

CHAPTER  VI  — CLUB  CORRESPONDENCE 

Accepting  membership 103 

Refusal  of  application  for  membership    ....  105 

Resignation,  from  club :    .    .    .    .  107 

Resignation,  formal 107 

Resignation,  informal 107 

Introducing  friend  for  membership      108 

Of  thanks  for  this  favor ....'..  109 

Extending  hospitality  of  club no 

Reply,  extending  hospitality  of  club      1 1 1 

Letter  of  condolence  upon  death  of  a  member  112 

Letter  of  condolence,  formal 113 

Letter  of  condolence,  informal      113 

CHAPTER  VII  -  MISCELLANEOUS  LETTERS 

Bon  voyage  letter 114 

Bon  voyage  letter  —  addressing  envelope       .    .  114 

Bon  voyage  note. 114 

Letter  of  welcome 115 

Letter  to  serving  class 117 

Formal  note 117 

Informal  note 118 

Letter  of  recommendation 118 

For  excellent  recommendation      119 

Letter  requesting  information 120 

Reply  giving  information       121 

Information  —  office  work 122 

Recommendation 122 

Derogatory „    .   .  V.   ,   .    .    .  123 

[xii   ] 


CONTENTS 

PAGE 

Letter  of  introduction 123 

Visiting  card,  introduction 126 

Begging  letter  for  charity      126 

Begging  letter  for  charity  —  reply  affirmative  128 

Begging  letter  for  charity  —  refusal 128 

To  act  as  patron  or  patroness 129 

To  act  as  patron  or  patroness  —  acceptance  .    .  131 

To  act  as  patron  or  patroness  —  refusal     ...  132 

The  child's  letter 132 

Of  thanks 133 

On  a  birthday      134 

French  mode  of  addressing  and  closing  letters  134 

In  addressing 134 

Concluding  a  letter 135 

Forms  for  concluding 135 

CHAPTER  VIII  — MODE  OF  ADDRESS 

For  women 138 

Two  women  with  same  name 138 

Divorced  woman 138 

Business  signature 139 

Husband's  official  title   . 139 

Title  for  wife 140 

Unmarried  women t 140 

Men 140 

Jr.  and  Sr 140 

Official  titles 141 

Officers  Army  and  Navy 141 

War  Office 142 

Foreign  legation 142 

CHART 

Titular  persons 143 


[   xiii   ] 


THE   SOCIAL  LETTER 


THE  SOCIAL  LETTER 


CHAPTER   I 
INTRODUCTION 

A  WISE   man   once    said:    "Never    put   in 
writing  what  you  would  not  care  to  see 
printed  in  the  newspaper." 

This  is  a  valuable  rule  to  tack  up  in  front  of 
our  desk  to  start  with,  and,  while  this  little  book 
aims  to  give  points  on  the  purely  social  side  of 
letter-writing,  the  nature  of  which  somewhat,  if 
not  entirely,  precludes  any  danger  of  having  our 
pen  run  away  with  us,  this  admonition  is  not 
altogether  uncalled  for  here. 

The  social  letter,  in  the  strict  sense  of  the  Function 
word,  differs  widely  from  the  friendly  letter  in  °      f 

i  •  •  r  i-        •  •     i 

that  it  is  written  for  a  distinct  social  purpose; 
for,  or  in  response  to,  a  purely  social  occasion. 
The  friendly  letter,  on  the  other  hand,  is  our 
proxy  for  a  little  tete-a-tete,  telling  of  the  per- 
sonal news  of  the  day  and  should  be  as  extem- 
poraneous as  daily  speech.  Such  letters,  over 


THE   SOCIAL   LETTER 

and  above  the  demands  of  education  and  good- 
breeding,  are  given  free  scope  and  it  would  be 
as  footless  to  dictate  rules  as  it  would  to  commit 
a  monologue  to  memory  prior  to  a  friendly 
visit. 

But  for  the  social  notes  there  are  certain  pre- 
scribed forms.  We  knit  our  brows  and  shake 
puzzled  heads  at  the  mere  thought  of  having  to 
write  them.  What  must  we  say  —  just  about 
how  much?  Mrs.  Grundy  is  at  our  elbow,  and 
the  knowledge  of  her  presence  muzzles  our 
spontaneity  and  we  resort  to  a  somewhat 
stereotyped  form  which,  we  feel  sure,  will  pass 
muster.  We  do  not  wish  to  commit  ourselves 
unduly,  therefore,  first  and  foremost  let  us  re- 
member that  a  social  letter  should  always  be 
brief.  As  Hamlet  has  it: 

"  Since  brevity  is  the  soul  of  wit 
And  tediousness  the  limbs  and  outward  flourishes 
I  will  be  brief." 

To-day,  of  all  times,  we  are  a  busy  people  with 
every  moment  precious,  therefore  just  put  our- 
selves in  the  position  of  a  prospective  hostess 
with  her  thousand-and-one  duties;  the  replies 
to  her  invitations  come  pouring  in.  For  her, 
at  this  particular  time,  the  one  interest  is,  not 
the  reason  why,  so  much  as  the  direct  knowledge 

[2   ] 


INTRODUCTION 

as  to  whether  she  may  or  may  not  be  able  to 
count  us  among  her  guests.  The  brief  advice 
is,  having  said  our  say,  stop. 

Simplicity  both    in  form    and  words   is  un-  Simplicit* 
affected  and  graceful.     Flowery  language,  ex-  of  Form 
travagant  expressions,  effusiveness  are,  for  the   j 
most  part,  effervescent,  and   lack  the  reserve 
and  dignity  that  are  the  passwords  to  good- 
breeding.      "Trimmings"    are    so    often    only 
pathetic  in  their  strained  and  obvious  efforts  to 
hide  deficiencies.    A  letter  filled  with  amenities 
is  like  so  much  suds,  and  contains  as  little  of  the 
real  essence,  so  that  the  recipient,  after  wading 
through  the  sea  of  words,  says  to  himself,  "and 
after  all  — what?" 

Oh,  the  joy  of  receiving  a  short  note  written 
to  the  point,  aptly  and  ably  expressed,  free  from 
all  redundancy! 

The  social  letter  admits   of  two  forms:  the  Forms 
formal  and  the  informal. 

The  formal  is  as  prescribed  and  conventional  Formal 
as  a  gentleman's  dress  suit,  and  should  be  as  Notes 
immaculate  in  conformation.    It  is  used  only  for 
invitations,  announcements  and  replies  thereto. 
In  the  formal  note  the  third  person  is  always 
used,  and  consistency,  or  rather  uniformity,  is 
strictly  adhered  to.    For  instance,  we  would  not 
say: 

[  3  1 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

Mrs.  Blank  Dash 
regrets  that  7  am  unable  to  accept 

Mrs.  Blank's 

kind  invitation  for  dinner 

on  Wednesday,  March  the  ninth, 

as  7  have  a  previous  engagement  for  that 

evening. 

In  the  second  and  last  lines  Mrs.  Dash  lapsed 
from  the  third  person  into  the  first  in  naming 
herself,  thus  throwing  the  whole  out  of  gear.  A 
good  suggestion  to  bear  in  mind  is  to  imagine 
that  another  person  is  writing  for  you,  and 
therefore  you  would  naturally  say: 

Mrs.  Blank  Dash 
regrets  that  she  is  unable  to  accept 

Mrs.  Blank's 

kind  invitation  for  dinner 

on  Wednesday,  March  the  ninth, 

as  she  has  a  previous  engagement  for  that 

evening. 

A  formal  note  always  demands  an  answer  in 
kind.  Among  intimate  friends  a  word  or  so  of 
greeting  may  be  added  to  "take  off  the  chill," 
as,  "do  try  to  come,"  etc.,  but  it  is  not  to 
be  denied  that  this  is  taking  liberties  with 
social  usage. 

The    third-person    note    should    always    be 

[  4  ] 


INTRODUCTION 

thought  out  with  regard  to  wording  and  spac- 
ing. As  a  general  rule,  date  and  hour  are  always 
spelled  out,  not  written  numerically. 

One  side  of  the  note-paper  should  hold  all  the 
text.  For  the  most  part  the  correspondence 
card  is  eschewed,  perhaps  for  the  reason  that  it 
presents  a  less  elegant  appearance  than  the 
double  sheet  folded  once.  But  in  the  case 
where  engraved  invitations  are  used  the  card 
is  resorted  to.  The  stamped  address  or  mono- 
gram is  never  used  on  engraved  invitations,  but 
where  there  is  a  coat  of  arms  or  crest,  these  may 
be  used  in  the  center,  small  and  embossed,  to 
lend  distinction. 

For  these,  no  cut-and-dried  formula  can  be  Informal 
given,  except  in  a  general  way.  Notes 

The  informal  note  holds  place  with  the  tuxedo 
coat,  as  the  formal  note  does  with  the  swallow- 
tail. 

Never,    and    this    is    most    important,    never  Forms  of 
address    a   person   in   a   purely   social   note   as  Address 
"Dear  Madam,"  or  "Dear  Sir."     Remember 
that  the  social  note  must  have  all  the  features 
of  a  few  moments'  chat  in  the  drawing-room, 
and  so  Mrs.  Dash  is  entitled  to  the  use  of  her 
name  upon  greeting,  to  show  the  entente  cordiale. 
Upon  no  other  occasion,  except  one  of  business, 
should  "Dear  Madam,"  etc.,  appear. 
[  5  ] 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

In  America  "my  dear"  is  considered  more 
formal  than  just  "dear"  —  the  reverse,  how- 
ever, is  the  case  in  England. 

In  Closing  It  is  a  fact  that  ninety-nine  times  out  of  a 
hundred  we  get  along  swimmingly  when  writing 
the  body  of  the  letter,  but  with  the  closing 
sentence  comes  the  rub.  How  to  break  away 
gracefully.  We  do  not  wish  to  do  this  too 
abruptly,  any  more  than  upon  meeting  a  friend 
should  we  leave  him  without  a  word  or  so  of 
well-wishing.  An  awkward  sentence  in  closing 
has  so  often  marred  what  would  have  been 
otherwise  a  good  letter,  and  the  unfortunate 
part  of  it  is  that  those  pesky  stumbling  words 
stick  in  the  memory  and  offset  the  rest  of  the 
epistle. 

Therefore,  let  us  always  try  to  make  a 
graceful  exit,  with  no  awkward  stumbling  and 
strained  expression,  but  with  a  smile  and  cordial 
handshake  that  will  linger  refreshingly  in  the 
memory  like  pleasant  incense  long  after  we  have 
turned  the  corner. 

It  would  be  well  in  a  measure  to  copy  the 
punctilious  French  with  their  inherent  good 
manners.  Always  in  writing  a  charming  little 
closing  phrase  is  adde'd,  as  (to  translate  liter- 
ally), "Receive,  I  pray  you,  my  sentiments 
the  best  and  most  sincere,"  or  such  like.  So 
[6] 


INTRODUCTION 

also  should  we  add  a  word  or  so  for  "  fragrance," 
as,  "trusting  that  these  few  words  find  you  and 
your  family  in  the  best  of  health,"  or  "I  hope 
the  near  future  will  give  me  the  pleasure  of  see- 
ing you  again,"  etc. 

The  rigid  rules  we  learned  and  conned  so 
diligently  with  regard  to  the  school-day  letter 
writing  have,  for  the  most  part,  been  consigned 
to  oblivion.  Just  as  our  chirography  changes 
in  character  as  we  get  on  in  years,  so  our 
thoughts  mature  and  get  away  from  the  copy- 
book style.  We  come  down  to  a  few  general 
rules  that  we  have  found  held  good  through 
time,  and  we  make  them  our  own. 

We  can  never  write  better  than  we  think. 

Endings  vary  in  degrees  of  warmth  and  are  Ending  the 
used  according  to  the  light  in   which   the  re-  Letter 
cipient  is  held.    The  table  given  here  indicates 
the  order  to  be  followed : 

Yours  truly 

Yours  very  truly  Used  only  in  business 

Yours  respectfully  letters 

Yours  very  respectfully 

Yours  sincerely 
Yours  very  sincerely 
Yours  most  sincerely 
Yours  cordially 

[  7  ] 


THE    SOCIAL   LETTER 

Yours  in  all  cordiality 
Yours  most  cordially 
Warmly  yours 
Yours  in  all  sincerity 
Yours  faithfully 
Yours  very  faithfully 

Yours  gratefully  When  a  favor  has  been  granted 

Yours  affectionately 
Very  affectionately  yours 
Yours  lovingly 
Very  lovingly  yours 

The  position  of  the  pronoun  "yours"  is  op- 
tional. If  the  preference  is  to  have  it  at  the 
last,  as,  "very  cordially  yours,"  it  is  quite  cor- 
rect, but  one  point  to  remember  in  this  small 
but  important  matter  of  endings  is,  that 
to  omit  the  pronoun  yours  is  exceedingly  bad 
form,  as,  "very  truly"  or  "sincerely,"  etc., 
aside  from  the  fact  that  the  phrase  is  left 
unfinished. 

Abbrevia-       Just  a  few  words  upon  this  matter:  Never 

tions  abbreviate.     At  first  sight  this  seems  a  pretty 

general  and  broad  statement  to  make,  but  if 

followed  literally  we  may  be  sure  that  if  we  err, 

it  will  be  on  the  right  side. 

Theword  and  is  always  entitled  to  its  full  three 
letters  and  never  the  sign  y.    With  the  words 
[  8  ] 


INTRODUCTION 

street,  place,  avenue,  square,  park,  etc.,  the  same 
holds  good,  as  with  the  name  of  the  month ;  any- 
thing short  of  the  full  spelling  is  distinctly  bad  and 
shows  carelessness  in  social  correspondence. 

Speaking  by  and  large,  we  are  known  by  the  Stationery 
stationery  we  use,  for  here  the  individual  comes  Etiquette 
tc  the  fore.  Good  or  bad  taste  may  be  apparent 
in  tone  of  paper  or  design.  There  is  as  much 
psychology  in  the  study  of  this  matter  as  in  the 
selection  of  the  clothes  we  wear.  In  those  who 
affect  the  ultra,  the  color  and  design  cry  it  aloud. 
In  what  category  would  you  place  the  woman 
who  is  partial  to  deep  purple  paper  and  white 
ink!  It  has  been  used.  Sufficient  to  say  that 
the  outre  is  offensive  to  good  taste;  such  as  start- 
ling colors,  the  fads  of  the  seasons,  —  the  queer, 
absurd  shapes  in  form  of  letter-paper  and  en- 
velope. Let  us,  who  wish  above  all  to  stand 
for  refinement  and  good-breeding,  neither  be 
like  a  flock  of  senseless  sheep  in  matters  of  selec- 
tion, accepting  the  very  latest  cri,  for  no  other 
reason  except  that  of  fashion,  nor  seek  to  at- 
tract attention  by  daring  originality.  It  is  hard 
to  say  which  is  the  worse  fault. 

A  quiet  tone,  if  white  be  not  chosen,  —  a 

monogram  that  in  its  very  simplicity  contains 

a  certain  amount  of  individuality,  the   subtle 

something  that  at  first  glance  pleases  the  eye 

[9  ] 


THE    SOCIAL   LETTER 

by  its  quiet  elegance,  are  the  things  to  aim  for. 
Fashions  differ  from  season  to  season  in  sta- 
tionery and  its  appurtenances  much  as  in  the 
varying  vogue  in  clothes.  But  in  this,  as  in  our 
dress,  the  exaggerated  styles  are  shunned  by  the 
person  of  refinement.  To  be  conspicuous  is 
never  his  aim. 

Many  keep  to  one  mode  of  stationery  and 
stamping  irrespective  of  changing  styles.  Their 
note-paper  becomes  as  familiar  to  their  friends 
as  their  physiognomy. 

The  Letter-  There  are,  generally  speaking,  three  distinct 
Sheet  sjzes  m  letter-paper.  The  largest  sheet,  which 
is  about  five  by  six  and  one-half  inches,  is  used 
for  general  correspondence,  its  generous  size 
allowing  for  a  lengthy  epistle.  Then  comes  the 
slightly  smaller  size  for  short  social  notes.  This 
must  not  be  too  small,  for  we  must  remember 
that  in  formal  notes  the  full  text  must  appear 
on  the  front  page  only.  And  lastly,  there  is  the 
smallest  of  all;  just  of  sufficient  size  to  allow  for 
a  few  words  of  congratulation  or  condolence  on 
its  four  sides,  or  less. 

Envelopes  The  envelopes  are  for  the  most  part  either 
square  or  oblong;  the  latter  have  ever  been 
the  more  popular,  the  square-shaped,  however, 
have  a  large  place  for  those  who  aim  for 
distinction. 

[  10] 


INTRODUCTION 

It  were  well  to  take  into  consideration  the  Mono- 
fact  that  this  is  an  age  for  simplicity  in  form,  grams 
Take,  for  instance,  architecture,  furniture,  dress.   Crests 
Where  are  the  frills  of  yesteryear?    What  has 
become  of  the  Moorish  decorations,  the  col- 
umnar and  arcaded,   the    arabesque    and  the 
profusion   of  meaningless   ornamentation   that 
stood  for  rococo?    They  have  disappeared  to 
give  place  to  simple  beauty  of  line.    To-day  the 
art  of  decoration  lies  not  so  much  in  what  to 
add  as  in  what  to  eliminate. 

So  it  is  with  our  letter-paper.  Let  us  avoid 
overdressing.  Originality  can  always  be  the 
keynote,  but  simplicity  in  style  must  go  hand 
in  hand.  Just  as  in  a  tailored  suit;  the  finer  the 
lines  the  better  the  tailor.  A  simple  design  in 
monograms  needs  more  the  master-hand  than 
one  surrounded  by  curly-cues  and  flourishes. 

The  place  for  the  stamping  is  optional.  Since 
we  have  agreed  that  stuffiness  is  tabooed,  the 
monogram  by  itself  or  the  address  alone  pre- 
sents a  better  appearance  than  both  together, 
for  one  seems  to  detract  from  the  other.  In  the 
placing  of  the  monogram,  the  center  of  the 
paper  or  the  left-hand  side  is  generally  used.  In 
the  case  of  the  address,  it  is  the  center  of  the 
paper  or  the  right-hand  side.  But  where  there 
is  a  country  house,  the  directions  are  sometimes 


THE    SOCIAL   LETTER 

set  in  very  small  letters  along  the  upper  left- 
hand  margin,  and  the  name  of  the  house  or 
town  at  the  right,  as: 


TELEPHONE,  748  VALLEY    VIEW 

TELEGRAPH.  BREWSTER  rAOMFI     M    V 

R.  R.  STATION,  BREWSTER.  N.  Y.  CARMtL,  N.  Y. 
POST  OFFICE.  CARMEL 


This  is  done  so  that  friends  coming  to  visit 
may  know  clearly  the  directions. 

Many  persons  have  the  fourth  page  stamped 
instead  of  the  first,  thus  making  the  first  the 
last.  It  has  been  found  convenient,  for  in  that 
way  the  two  outer  sheets  are  used  in  sequence 
as  are  the  two  inner.  This  does  away  with  the 
first  and  third,  second  and  fourth  order,  which 
has  been  found  in  many  cases  to  be  confusing. 
This  form  of  using  the  sheet  presents  a  very 
neat  appearance. 

Addressing  After  having  experimented  and  found  just 
and  Dating  what  pleases  us  most,  it  would  be  well  to 
make  a  set  of  rules  in  the  matter  of  form. 
Once  having  mastered  them,  there  should  be 
no  further  thought  as  to  what  must  be  done 
under  this  or  that  condition.  This  is  not  only 
time-saving  but  mind-saving.  To  many,  this 

[    12    ] 


INTRODUCTION 

attention  to  details  may  seem  trifling,  but  a 
wiser  person  than  the  author  has  said,  that  "it 
is  the  little  things  that  count." 

The  most  commonly  used  form  for  writing  the 
address  and  date  is  at  the  upper  right-hand 
side  of  the  paper.  This  is,  of  course,  granting 
that  the  address  is  not  stamped,  but  should 
it  be,  the  date  placed  at  the  end  of  the 
letter  at  the  lower  left-hand  side  is  better  for 
conformity,  so  as  to  obviate  any  writing  at  the 
top  of  the  sheet  where  the  stamping  appears  as : 

(Stamped)     29  RIVERDALE  PLACE, 

YONKERS,  NEW  YORK. 

Heading 

Body  of  letter 

Closing 

Signature 

Date 

Then,  again,  we  find  very  often  that  on  un- 
stamped paper  the  writer  leaves  both  the  ad- 
dress and  date  until  after  the  signature.  This 
can  be  satisfactorily  explained,  for  many  con- 
tend that,  especially  where  the  recipient  is  not 
[  13  ] 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

well  acquainted  with  the  writer,  the  name, 
date  and  address  may  be  seen  altogether  at 
one  glance. 

It  is  rather  nice  to  see  the  date  and  address 
spelled  out  in  social  notes.  A  good  rule  to  follow 
in  this  matter  is  to  spell  out  both  address  and 
date  if  both  happen  to  be  short,  as,  Twenty-five 
West  Fourth  Street.  But  when  one  spells  out 
the  date,  it  would  be  better  to  write,  March  the 
sixth,  or  March  sixth,  and  omit  the  year,  for  if 
we  wish  to  add  the  year  we  should  not  add  it 
numerically  and  spelling  it  out  would  make  it 
too  "  heavy."  If  the  year  is  to  be  added,  it  were 
better  to  write  it:  March  6,  1918.  Even  in  so 
small  a  matter,  consistency  must  be  held  to, 
were  this  not  so  it  would  show  plainly  we  were 
not  at  ease  with  social  usages. 

The       In  the  editorial  office  of  a  magazine  the  re- 

Opening  jection  of  a  manuscript  many  times  lies  in  the 

Paragraph  fact  ^^  the  firgt  page  presents  too  «thick"  an 

appearance.      The    long    and    heavily    worded 

opening  paragraph  has  prevented  more  than 

one  reader  from  wading  through  it  to  what 

might  have  proved  to  be   a  most  interesting 

story.    This  also  applies  to  letter-writing.    Short 

sentences  are  always  safer  than  long  ones  and 

Punctua-  ma^e  clearer  reading.     Profuse  punctuation  or 

tion  conjunctions  do  not  always  help  us  through  a 

[  H  ] 


INTRODUCTION 

forest  of  dense  wording  and  are  apt  to  get  us 
very  involved  as  to  just  what  we  mean  to  say. 

Always   leave   a    margin    of    at    least   three-  Appear- 
fourths  of  an  inch  in  large  sheets  and  one-half  o.nce  of 
in  smaller  at  the  left-hand  side,  and  a  slightly 
smaller  one  at  the  right-hand  side.  This  gives  the 
letter  the  appearance  of  being  set  in  a  frame. 

It  is  not  always  the  man  of  genius  whose  Chirog- 
handwriting  is  the  despair  of  his  friends;  illegi-  raphy 
bility  is  often  due  to  haste,  carelessness  and 
thoughtlessness  and  may  cause  our  letters  to 
be  received  with  anything  but  the  cordiality  we 
had  hoped  for,  since  the  deciphering  makes  for 
a  painful  ordeal.  The  tendency  is  to  run  our 
ing's  until  they  are  nothing  but  a  jagged  line  with 
a  little  tail.  We  forget  to  dot  our  Fs  so  that 
they  get  mistaken  for  another  character,  as  is 
the  case  with  t's  that  remain  uncrossed. 

Slurred  writing   is   counterpart   to   mumbling 
speech. 

Some  textbooks  have  it  that  in  social  notes  Addressing 
the  number  of  the  street,  if  it  contains  not  more  Envelopes 
than  two  figures,  should  be  spelled  out.     The 
argument  in  refutation  is:  Consider  the  poor 
postman!     Think  of  the  thousands  of  letters 
he  must  handle  and  whose  addresses  he  has  to 
decipher  daily.     A  week  of  such  a  rule  as  sug- 
gested above  would  send  the  poor  man  to  a 
[   15  1 


THE    SOCIAL   LETTER 

sanitarium  to  recuperate  from  a  bad  attack  of 
brain  fever! 

Remember  that  the  envelope  is  the  wrapping 
paper,  —  it  must  present  explicit  directions. 
Therefore  it  is  necessary  to  make  the  name  and 
address  as  clear  and  concise  as  it  is  possible  to 
do.  Never  be  afraid  to  give  too  full  instruc- 
tions, for  the  dead-letter  office  may  receive 
your  letter  if  "you  don't  watch  out." 

In  the  case  of  addressing  an  envelope  to  a 
person  residing  in  New  York  City,  it  were 
always  wiser  to  write,  New  York  City,  New  York. 
This  will  preclude  any  chance  of  its  going  astray 
were  it  written  merely  New  York,  and  at  least 
gives  the  writer  the  satisfaction  of  knowing 
that  he  has  done  all  that  he  can  to  insure  his 
letter  arriving  at  its  proper  destination. 

If  the  address  is  very  brief,  as,  Thirty  West 
Fourth  Street,  or  600  Fifth  Avenue,  the  number 
of  the  house  may  be  written  numerically  and 
the  number  of  the  street  or  avenue  spelled. 

The  word  "for"  written  before  the  name  is  a 
fad  that  is  not  indulged  in  by  the  "best  people," 
as: 

For 

Mrs.  Blank  Dash 

besides  the  fact  of  its  being  entirely  unnecessary. 
[  16  ] 


INTRODUCTION 

In  the  matter  of  writing  the  name  of  the 
state  without  abbreviation,  the  answer  is,  that 
if  it  should  happen  to  be  very  long  it  is  right 
to  abbreviate  if  one  wishes,  but  if  short,  like 
Maine,  it  must  never  be  abbreviated.  The 
usual  form  of  addressing  envelopes  is: 

Mrs.  Blank  Dash, 

14  Courtlandt  Place, 

Trenton, 
New  Jersey 
or: 

Mrs.  Blank  Dash, 
14  Courtlandt  Place, 
Trenton, 
New  Jersey 

The  first  is  the  more  popular,  though  the  last 
is  newer  and  sometimes  effected. 

The  postage  stamp  should  be  put  on  care- 
fully in  the  upper  right-hand  corner  of  the  en- 
velope. The  "slapped-on"  effect  that  teeters 
on  one  angle  makes  as  poor  an  appearance  to 
the  ensemble  of  the  envelope  as  a  carelessly  tied 
cravat  on  an  immaculate  collar.  Again,  con- 
sistency in  care  and  thought  results  in  a  splendid 
whole. 

If  the  letter  is  to  be  forwarded,  a  notation  in 
small  writing  may  be  added  in  the  lower  left- 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

hand  corner,  as,  "//  not  at  given  address  kindly 
forward,"  or  just  the  words,  "Kindly  (or  please) 
forward." 

The  words  personal  or  important  should  not 
be  added  if  the  letter  be  sent  by  mail.  Only  in 
the  case  where  it  is  delivered  by  hand  may  they 
be  used.  We  trust  Uncle  Sam's  men  to  see  that 
our  letter  reaches  its  destination  on  schedule 
time,  —  not  so,  always,  with  private  employees. 
Elimina-  Do  not  let  us  forget  that  correspondence  is 
tion  of  the  blood-relation  to  the  personal  visit.  For  in- 
£°  stance,  if  a  guest  entered  our  home  we  would, 
I  am  sure,  put  his  interest  foremost  in  our  con- 
versation, at  least  until  he  had  told  us  all  he 
wished  to  say  on  the  subject.  Had  he  been  in 
ill  health,  in  stress  of  worry,  we  would  inquire 
how  he  was  getting  along.  If,  in  his  family,  there 
had  been  illness,  we  would  be  solicitous ;  then,  only 
when  that  topic  had  been  exhausted,  would  we 
intrude  our  own  affairs.  We  always  offer  our 
guest  the  best  chair,  while  we  content  ourselves 
for  the  time  being  with  the  straight-backed, 
spindle-legged  one.  So  it  is  in  writing  letters. 
Never,  if  we  can  avoid  it,  must  we  bring  the 
personal  in  starting  our  letter.  That  does  not 
mean  that  we  may  not  start  our  letter  with  the 
pronoun  "I,"  as  we  were  taught  not  to  do  in 
days  gone  by,  but  if  we  do  use  it,  let  us  make  the 
[  18  ] 


INTRODUCTION 

"I"  subservient  to  the  "you"  and  "your." 
The  first  person  pronoun  staring  at  us  at  the 
beginning  of  every  paragraph  is  not  only  poor 
writing  but  creates  a  poor  effect;  having  the 
interest  of  the  recipient  at  heart  carries  almost 
invariably  a  feeling  of  warmth  and  brings  in 
return  a  more  cordial  response. 

There   is   much   to   say  with   regard   to   the  Psychologi- 

psychological  effect  on  receipt  of  a  letter.     Let  ca}  Bftct 

•11  of  a  Letter 

us  always  bear  m  mind  the  type  01  person  to 

whom  we  are  writing.  Letter-writing  is  an  art 
and  should  be  treated  as  such. 

Sometimes  the  lightest  touch,  a  mere  hint, 
is  all  that  should  be  sent  to  John,  while  Henry, 
being  a  totally  different  sort  of  a  fellow,  needs 
to  have  your  thoughts  baldly  and  plainly  put. 
There  is  the  analytical  person  —  he  reads  be- 
tween the  lines  —  a  sentence  left  in  abeyance 
causes  suspicion.  Look  out  when  writing  to 
such  an  one.  Uncle  George  is  a  crotchety  old 
man;  under  his  gruff  exterior  he  hides  a  heart 
of  gold.  He  is  indeed  well  worth  humoring; 
don't  tread  on  his  toes.  Aunt  Matilda,  on  the 
other  hand,  is  garrulous  and  especially  wishes 
you  to  dilate  upon  her  latest  trouble.  Without 
hypocrisy,  do  so,  since  you  are  pleasing  her  at 
no  cost  to  others. 

In  other  words,  we  should  take  into  con- 
[  19  ] 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

sideration  the  peculiarities  and  foibles  of  the 
person  to  whom  we  are  writing.  In  all  social 
intercourse  there  is  inevitably  the  "rebound;" 
let  us  take  care  that  it  is  not  such  as  will  come 
up  with  force  and  strike  us  in  the  face. 
Answering  How  many  of  us  really  answer  a  letter?  That 
a  Letter  js  to  saVj  we  mav  write  to  Mrs.  Dash  because 
Mrs.  Dash  wrote  to  us,  but  do  we  make  our 
replies  dovetail?  It  is  a  wise  plan  always  to 
keep  the  letter  to  be  answered  until  we  have 
done  so,  reading  it  over  just  prior  to  sitting  down 
to  the  task  and  so,  having  the  contents  well  in 
mind,  we  can  reply  to  questions  asked,  inquire 
after  the  welfare  of  someone  or  make  mention 
of  certain  conditions  referred  to. 

The  Note       Ofttimes   we   say  to    ourselves :    "  I    wonder 

anV£  a  whether  this  needs  an  answer?"    The  solution 

essage  tQ  ^^  remarjc  js .  When  in  doubt  —  answer. 

The  mere  fact  that  a  question  arose  in  our  mind 

is  sufficient  reason  to  warrant  the  taking  up  of 

our  pen. 

It  is  not  by  any  means  the  long,  effusive  letter 
that  contains  a  message.  In  sorrow  or  joy  a 
few  words  written  from  the  heart  may  linger, 
much  as  the  sincere  clasp  of  a  hand,  while  a 
collection  of  words  may  ring  as  hollow  as  an 
empty  barrel,  and  further,  if  saturated  with 
banalities,  leave  a  sickish  feeling.  One  cannot 
[  20  ] 


INTRODUCTION 

always  write  deep  from  the  heart  to  certain 
persons.  If  that  be  the  case,  then  let  us  write 
as  little  as  we  dare.  Sitting  down  to  a  duty 
letter  in  rebellious  mood  is  death  to  endeavor, 
for  strive  as  we  may,  the  strain  of  writing  will 
show.  So,  let  us  try  to  get  ourselves  into  the 
right  frame  of  mind  and  seek  to  write  the  kind 
of  a  letter  we  ourselves  would  wish  to  receive 
were  the  circumstances  reversed.  It  is  an  in- 
exorable maxim  that  we  receive  in  such  measure 
as  we  give.  Mere  pretty  words  are  like  flowers 
without  fragrance,  and  this  lack  of  "perfume" 
is  as  quickly  detected. 

Never  use  business  paper  for  a  social  note        Don'ts 

Never  typewrite  a  social  note 

Never  abbreviate  in  a  social  note 

Never  begin  with  Dear  Madam  or  Dear  Sir 

Never  underscore  words 

Never  use  postscripts 

Never  use  the  sign  #  for  number 

The  examples  of  notes  that  appear  in  the  follow- 
ing chapters  are,  in  the  case  of  formal  notes, 
absolute  types  of  how  such  notes  should  be 
worded,  spaced,  and  punctuated.  Several  dif- 
ferent forms  are  shown  in  some  cases  and  are 
given  in  their  order  of  popularity.  But,  in  the 
informal  notes,  where  form  and  language  should 

[    21     ] 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

be  unstilted,  the  examples  of  such  are  given 
merely  to  suggest  a  trend  or  sequence  of  thought. 
They  should  not  be  copied  verbatim,  for  this 
would  tend  to  shackle  the  mind  of  the  writer, 
and  all  originality  of  thought  would  be  lost. 
They  are  but  building  materials,  and  should 
so  be  used. 


CHAPTER   II 
THE   INVITATION 

Avf    invitation,   no     matter    how    informal,   When  to 
should   always   be   acknowledged   within  Answer  an 
a  week  of  its  receipt.     This  acknowledgment,     nvita  Wl 
whether  acceptance  or  refusal,  should  be  made 
definite,  for  any  doubtful  expression,  such  as: 
"I  hope  to  be  able  to  come  if — ,"  or  "If  I  re- 
turn to  town  in  time  I  shall  be  most  pleased  — ,"    The 
etc.,  leaves  the  hostess-elect  very  much  at  sea;  Definite 
in  what  state  of  mind  would  she  be  if  eight      e$  y 
out  of  ten  responses  contained  such  a  clause? 
Our  answer,  therefore,  must  be  made  a  posi- 
tive acceptance  or  regret,  and  we  must  abide  by 
our  decision.    There  are  times  when  the  hostess 
is  so  very  desirous  of  having  us  on  a  particular 
occasion,  that  she,  herself,  gives  us  the  oppor- 
tunity in  a  loop-hole    clause.     Then,  we  may 
give  the  conditional  answer. 

As  was  said  in  the  preceding  chapter,  an  in- 
vitation must  always  be  answered  in  kind. 
The  formal  reply  for  the  formal  invitation,  the 
wording  to  follow  very  closely  that  of  the  invi- 
tation. While  the  informal  invitation  should 
[  23  ] 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

receive  a  reply  in  the  first  person,  the  wording 
of  which  must  cover  only  the  matter  in  hand, 
it  should  be  free  from  all  stilted  phrasing  and 
have  a  pleasing  cordiality  in  tone. 

To  Whom  Where  there  are  husband  and  wife,  neither 
to  Address  One  nor  the  other  should  be  omitted  in  an  even- 
tions  m&  mvitation,  unless  it  be  a  "one  sex"  club 
affair  or  "  stag."  Where  there  is  also  a  daughter 
to  be  invited,  she  may  be  included  in  the  word- 
ing of  the  invitation;  where  two  daughters,  a 
separate  invitation  should  be  sent  to  "The 
Misses  Blank."  But,  on  the  other  hand,  in- 
vitations sent  to  the  men  of  the  family,  other 
than  the  husband,  should  be  mailed  separately 
to  each  member. 

The  full  name  of  the  writer,  whether  issuing 
invitation  or  replying,  should  be  used,  while 
only  the  last  name  should  be  written  to  the  one 
to  whom  we  are  writing  as,  in  invitation: 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  John  Monroe  Smith 

request  the  pleasure  of 
Mr.  and  Mrs.  Hooper's,  etc. 

while,  in  reply: 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Harold  Dwight  Hooper 

regret  (or  accept) 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Smith's,  etc. 

[  24  ] 


THE    INVITATION 

When  an  invitation  is  sent  to  Mr.  and  Mrs.    To  Whom 
Blank,  the  acknowledgment  must  be  made  in  to  Address 
both  names,  and  if  the  daughter  is  included,  her      .'  y 
name  must  also  be  added.     If  Mr.  and  Mrs. 
Dash  send  an  invitation,  the  acknowledgment 
must  be  made  to  both,  but  the  envelope  must  be 
addressed  to  Mrs.  Dash  only.     For,  while  hus- 
band and  wife  act  together  in  the  social  func- 
tion itself,  the  wife  is  the  active  manager  in 
getting  up  the  affair. 

If  the  invitation  be  sent  to  a  man,  he  should 
acknowledge  it  personally,  but  when  sent  to 
husband  and  wife,  the  latter  should  answer 
for  both. 

Where  husband  and  wife  are  both  invited 
and  the  husband  is  unable  to  attend,  the  wife 
should  send  regrets  for  both,  but  if  she  wishes 
to  state  that  "Owing  to  Mr.  Dash's  absence 
from  town,"  etc.,  the  hostess  can  ask  Mrs. 
Dash  alone,  if  she  wishes,  who  may  accept 
without  her  husband. 

If  the  invitation  is  made  out:  "The  Board  of  For  Club 

Managers  of  the Club  request  the  pleasure,"  Invitations 

etc.,  the  answer  must  be  given  with  the  same 
wording  as  appears  on  the  invitation  and  sent 
to  the  person  in  charge  whose  name  is  generally 
written  on  the  lower  left-hand  corner  with 
personal  address.  Where  no  such  information 
[  25  ] 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

is  given,  the  reply  must  be  made  out  to  the 
said  board  of  managers,  etc.,  and  sent  to  the 
club  address. 

Visiting       Never  acknowledge  an  invitation  of  any  kind 
Card  on  a  visiting  card,  even  though  a  visiting  card 
is  used  in  invitation.     (See  receptions,  garden 
parties,  at  homes.) 

The  In  large,  formal  social  functions,  the  in- 
Engraved  yitations  are  always  engraved.  These  very 
Invitation  f  i  •  •  •  i_  u  u 

formal  invitations   should   be  sent  out  two  or 

three  weeks  in  advance  by  mail  or  messenger. 
This  gives  the  prospective  hostess  time  to 
fill  in,  in  case  of  regrets.  It  is  always  a  good 
plan  to  have  a  long  reserve  list  for  such  con- 
tingencies. 

Afternoon  Invitations  for  afternoon  affairs,  such  as 
Affairs  at  homes  and  garden  parties,  are  issued  in 
the  name  of  the  hostess  alone,  or,  if  she 
has  a  daughter  or  daughters  in  society,  they 
may  be  included,  but  not  the  men  of  the 
house. 

Invitation  A  young  gir)  does  not  send  invitations  to 
through  men  in  her  own  name,  but  in  that  of  her  mother, 

av*    er  or  person  under  whose  guardianship  or  chap- 
or  Young 

Girl  eronage  she  happens  to  be.     bo  she  would  say, 

that  her  mother,  her  aunt,  Mrs.  Dash,  etc. 
(as  case  may  be),  desires  her  to  extend  the 
invitation,  etc. 

[  26  ] 


THE    INVITATION 

Without  wishing  to  infringe  into  social  cus-  Leaving 
toms   other  than   letter  etiquette,  there   must  Cafds 
be  a  word  said  in  regard  to  the  leaving  of  cards 
in  response  to  invitations  sent.     It  has  so  long 
been  a  debatable  question  as  to  just  when  to 
leave  cards,  that  there  has,  at  last,  been  an  ac- 
cepted  rule   made   for  those    who  wish   to  be 
considered  punctilious  in  these  matters. 

If  unable  to  accept  an  invitation,  a  card 
should  be  left  at  the  home  of  the  hostess  just 
prior  to  the  date  of  the  invitation.  If  accepted, 
not  later  than  two  weeks  after  the  affair  is 
given. 

When  a  bachelor  gives  a  dinner,  the  women 
invited  never  leave  cards  at  his  home  or 
club. 

In  replying  to  invitations,  always  be  explicit  Details 
as  to  day  of  week,  date  and  hour  set,  copying  to  be 
each  from  the  invitation  itself.     Then,  if  by  Considered 
any  chance  the  hostess  has  made  an  error,  she 
will  note  it  by  your  quoting  her  in  your  reply. 
It  thus  avoids  most  awkward  and  embarrass- 
ing situations  for  both  parties,  such  as  coming 
on  the  wrong  day  or  at  the  wrong  hour.     But 
when   answering   in   "regret,"   the   hour   need 
not  be  mentioned,   for  the  very  obvious   rea- 
son that  if  you  are  unable  to  come  on  this  date 
the  time  set  is  of  no  importance. 
[  27  ] 


THE    SOCIAL   LETTER 


Dinners 


Invitation 
Formal 


In  sending  invitations  and  replies  the  date 
of  writing  may  or  may  not  be  added.  In  the 
following  examples  the  dates  are  omitted. 

Where  invitations  are  not  engraved  and  the 
paper  is  stamped  with  address,  the  address  added 
in  the  following  is  to  be  ignored. 

As  the  dinner  invitation  is  the  highest  form 
of  courtesy,  it  will  be  given  precedence  of  all 
others  in  the  following  examples : 


MR.  AND    MRS.  BLANK   DASH 

REQUEST  THE  PLEASURE  OF 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Blank's 

COMPANY  AT  DINNER 


ON   THURSDAY.  FEBRUARY 
AT  EIGHT  O'CLOCK 


SIXTH 


433  NORTH  AVENUE 


Invitation 
Formal 

Engraved 

Form  with 

Blank  for 

Name 


MR.  AND  MRS.  BLANK  DASH 

REQUEST  THE  PLEASURE  OF 


433  NORTH  AVENUE 


[28] 


THE    INVITATION 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Dash  Blank  Acceptance 

accept  with  pleasure  Formal 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Dash's 
kind  invitation  for  dinner 
on  Thursday,  February  the  sixth 

at  eight  o'clock 
65  West  Drive 

or: 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Dash  Blank 

have  much  pleasure  in  accepting 

the  very  kind  invitation  of 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Dash 
for  dinner  on  Thursday,  February  the  sixth 

at  eight  o'clock 
6^  West  Drive 

In  writing  regrets    it  is   always   more   cour-  Regret 
teous  to  give  the  reason  for  inability  to  accept,  Formal 
but  this  is  not  always  done. 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Dash  Blank 

regret  that  a  previous  engagement 

prevents  their  accepting 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Dash's 

kind  invitation  for  dinner 

on  Thursday,  February  the  sixth 

65  West  Drive 

[  29  ] 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

or: 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Dash  Blank 

regret  exceedingly  that  they 

are  unable  to  accept 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Dash's 

kind  invitation  for  dinner 

on  Thursday,  February  the  sixth 

65  West  Drive 

Special       When  an   invitation   is   given   for  a   special 

Purpose  purpose  as,  for  instance,  to  meet  a  friend  from 
Invitation  ^     r~ 

out  or  town,  a  debutante,  an  engaged  couple,  a 

person  of  distinction,  or  a  Committee  or  Board 
of  Directors  of  some  society,  this  fact  is  placed, 
in  the  case  of  engraved  invitation  cards,  in 
the  upper  right-hand  corner  of  the  invitation, 
as,  "to  meet  Miss  Doe,"  or  "to  meet  Miss 
Blank  and  Mr.  Dash,"  etc.  If  the  invitation 
is  written,  this  information  is  incorporated  in 
the  body  as: 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Blank  Dash 
request  the  pleasure  of 

Mr.  Colt's 

company  at  dinner 

on  Tuesday,  January  the  first 

at  eight  o'clock 

to  meet  General  and  Mrs  Lucius  Ring 
433  North  Avenue 

[  30  ] 


THE    INVITATION 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Dash  Blank  Special 

.  .      .  Purpose 

accept  with  pleasure  Reply 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Dash's  Acceptance 

kind  invitation  for  dinner 
on  Thursday,  January  the  twelfth 

at  eight  o'clock 

to  meet  General  and  Mrs.  Lucius  Ring 
West  Drive 


In  all  invitations  from  clubs,  societies,  etc., 
the  full  title  is  given,  as  shown  below. 

Mr.  Thomas  Colt  Special 

regrets  that  absence  from  town  £^?°^ 

prevents  his  accepting  Regret 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Blank's 
kind  invitation  for  dinner 
on  Tuesday  ',  January  the  first, 
to  meet  the  Board  of  Directors  of 

the  National  Bounty  Society 
Main  Street 


If  the  dinner  is  given  in  a  place  other  than 
the  home,  the  fact  must  be  noted  in  the  body 
of  the  invitation  as  : 

[  3i   ] 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

Invitation  Mr.  and  Mrs.  Blank  Dash 

when  held  request  the  pleasure  of 

in  Place  ,,  ,  ,/.       „,      ,, 

other  than  Mrs'  and  Miss  Blank's 

Home  company  at  dinner 

at  Sherry's 
on  Thursday,  March  the  twentieth 

at  half  past  seven  o'clock 
65  Northern  Avenue 

Acceptance  Mrs.  Dash  Blank  and  Miss  Blank 

accept  with  much  pleasure 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Dash's 
very  kind  invitation  for  dinner 

at  Sherry's 
on  Thursday,  March  the  twentieth 

at  half  past  seven  o'clock 
70  Marlborough  Road 

Regret  Mrs.  Dash  Blank  and  Miss  Blank 

regret  exceedingly  that  they 

are  unable  to  accept 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Dash's 

very  kind  invitation  for  dinner 

at  Sherry's 
on  Thursday,  March  the  twentieth, 

owing  to  a  previous  engagement 
to  dine  with  Mr.  and  Mrs.  Trowbridge 
70  Marlborough  Road 

[  32  ] 


THE    INVITATION 

The   informal   invitation   is   always   sent  by   The 
the    wife    for    her    husband    and    self,    to    the  Informal 
wife,    including    the    latter's    husband    in   the 
invitation. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Dash, 

Will  you  and  Mr.  Dash  give  us  the  pleasure 
of  your  company  at  a  small  dinner  on  Thurs- 
day, October  the  sixth,  at  half  past  seven 
o'clock? 

Trusting  that  we  may  have  you  with  us,  I 
remain, 

Yours  very  sincerely, 

Helen  Doe  Blank. 

Note  that  the  wife  always  signs  herself  by 
her  Christian,  maiden  and  married  name,  or  by 
using  only  the  initial  for  the  maiden  name. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Blank, 

Both  Mr.  Dash  and  I  will  be  very  glad  to  Informal 
dine  with  you  and  Mr.   Blank  on  Thursday,  Acceptance 
October  the  sixth,  at  half  past  seven  o'clock. 
With  cordial  greetings,  I  am, 

Very  sincerely  yours, 

Edith  T.  Dash. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Blank, 

Unfortunately  Mr.  Dash  and  I  have  a  pre-  Informal 
vious    engagement    for    dinner    on    Tuesday,  Regret 
October  sixth.    We  are  so  very  sorry  not  to  be 

[  33  ] 


THE   SOCIAL   LETTER 

able  to  accept  your  kind   invitation  for  that 
evening. 

With  kind  regards,  believe  me, 

Yours  cordially, 

Emily  P.  Dash. 

Daughter       When  the  daughter  of  the  house  is  hostess  in 
of  House  ner  father's  home,  she   always  issues  the  invi- 
tation including  his  name  as: 

My  dear  Mrs.  Blank, 

Father  wishes  me  to  say  that  he  would  be  so 
pleased  to  have  you  and  Mr.  Blank  dine  with 
us  on  Monday,  April  the  tenth,  at  quarter  past 
seven  o'clock. 

Hoping  very  much  that  you  have  no  other 
engagement  for  that  evening,  I  am, 

Yours  most  sincerely, 

Evelyn  S.  Andrews. 

My  dear  Miss  Andrews, 

Acceptance       We  are  most  pleased  to  accept  your  father's 
kind  invitation  to  dine  with  you  on  Monday, 
April  the  tenth,  at  quarter  past  seven  o'clock. 
With  cordial  greetings  to  you  both,  I  remain, 
Yours  very  sincerely, 
Margaret  Grey  Blank. 

My  dear  Miss  Andrews, 

Regret  It  is  with  much  regret  that  I  write  to  say 
that  a  previous  engagement  for  dinner  on  Mon- 
day, April  the  tenth,  prevents  our  accepting 

[  34  ] 


THE    INVITATION 


your  father's  most  kind  invitation  for  that  eve- 
ning. Will  you  kindly  convey  our  thanks  for 
thinking  of  us? 

With  kind  regards,  I  am, 

Very  sincerely  yours, 

Edith  James  Doe. 

Invitations  for  dinners  and  luncheons  often  Including 
include    concert,    opera,    lecture,    matinee    or  Opera,  etc. 
theatre.     This  is  sometimes  added,  in  case  of 
formal  invitations,  at  the  end  as : 


MR.  AND   MRS.  BLANK  DASH 

REQUEST  THE    PLEASURE    OF 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Blank's 

COMPANY  AT  DINNER 

On  Wednesday,  March  the  fourth 
At  half  past  seven  o'clock 

And  afterward  for  the  play  (or  opera,  etc.) 


56    BROAD    VIEW   AVENUE 


Mr.  and  Mrs.  Blank  Dash 

request  the  pleasure  of 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Blank's 

company  for  dinner  and  opera 

on  Friday,  March  the  thirteenth 

at  quarter  past  seven  o'clock 

[  35   1 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

Acceptance  Mr.  and  Mrs.  Dash  Blank 

accept  with  much  pleasure 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Dash's 

kind  invitation  for  dinner 

on  Wednesday,  March  the  fourth 

at  half  past  seven  o'clock 

and  afterward  for  the  play 

65  West  Drive 

Regret  Mr.  and  Mrs.  Dash  Blank 

regret  that  they  are 

unable  to  accept 

the  kind  invitation  of 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Dash 

for  dinner  and  opera 

on  Friday,  March  the  fourth, 

owing  to  a  previous  engagement 

65  West  Drive 

LUNCHEONS 

Luncheon    invitations,    while    for    the    most 

part     less     formal     than     those     for    dinners, 

follow    them    in    wording.     They    are     issued 

only  in  the  name  of  the  hostess,  except  when 

[  36] 


THE    INVITATION 


men  are  invited.  Therefore,  the  following  ex- 
amples will  give  not  only  the  form,  but  will 
also  embody  the  different  special  occasions,  so 
that  the  reader  will  become  familiar  with  all 
kinds. 


To  meet  Miss  Edith  Howe 
MRS.  BLANK  DASH 

REQUESTS  THE   PLEASURE  OF 

Formal 
Invitation 
"  to  meet" 
and  to  the 
Matinee 

Miss  Doe's 

COMPANY  AT  LUNCHEON 

on  Wednesday,  November  the  fourth 
at  half  past  one  o'clock 

and  afterward  to  the  matinee 

Miss  Doe 
accepts  with  pleasure 

Mrs.  Dash's 

very  kind  invitation  for  luncheon 
on  Wednesday,  November  the  fourth 

at  half  past  one  o'clock 
to  meet  Miss  Howe  and  to  go 

afterward  to  the  matinee 
78  N.  Tremont  Street 

[  37  ] 


Reply 
Acceptance 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

Formal  Miss  Doe 

regrets  that  a  previous  engagement 
prevents  her  from  accepting 

Mrs.  Dash's 

very  kind  invitation  for  luncheon 
on  Wednesday ,  November  the  fourth 

to  meet  Miss  Howe 
and  to  go  afterward  to  the  matinee 
78  N.  Tremont  Street 

My  dear  Mrs.  Dash, 

Informal       Will  you   and   Edith   come  to  luncheon  on 

Invitation  Tuesday,  May  the  sixth,  at  half  past  one  o'clock  ? 

Mrs.  John  Doe  and  her  daughter  Amy  will  be 

here  and  I  should  so  like  to  have  you  both 

meet  them. 

Hoping  to  hear  that  you  have  no  previous 
engagement  for  that  day,  I  am, 

Cordially  yours, 

Ethel  York  Blank. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Dash, 

Will  you  lunch  with  me  most  informally  on 
Thursday,  the  sixth  of  March,  at  half  past  one 
o'clock? 

Hoping  so  much  that  you  can,  I  am, 
Yours  cordially, 

Ethel  Y.  Blank. 

[  38  ] 


THE    INVITATION 

My  dear  Mrs.  Blank, 

Both  Edith  and  I  will  be  most  glad  to  come  Informal 
to  you  for  luncheon  on  Tuesday,  May  the  sixth,  Acceptance 
at  half  past  one  o'clock.     It  will  give  us  great 
pleasure  to  meet  your  friend  and  her  daughter, 
of  whom  we  have  heard  such  charming  reports. 
Thank  you  so  much  for  thinking  of  us. 
Yours  very  sincerely, 

Marion  Blank  Dash. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Blank, 

It  is  with  great  regret  that  I  must  decline  Informal 
your    very    kind    invitation    for    luncheon    on  Regret 
Thursday,  the    sixth    of  March,  to    meet   the 
Board  of  Directors  of  the  Clodine  Club,  as  I 
am  having  a  little  luncheon  at  home  on  that 
day  for  my  young  daughter. 

With  cordial  good  wishes,  I  am, 
Sincerely  yours, 

Mary  V.  Dash. 

These  are  always  sent  in  letter  form  as,  for  Informal 
the    most    part,  such   entertainments    are    in-  for  Theatre, 
formal  affairs.  gjJJJ^  Qr 

Party 
My  dear  Miss  Doe, 

We  are  planning  a  little  party  of  eight  to  go 
to  the  play  on  Wednesday  evening  next,  with 
supper  at  home  after,  and  would  be  delighted 
to  be  able  to  count  you  among  our  guests. 

We  are  to  meet  in  the  lobby  of  the  Singer 
Theatre  at  quarter  past  eight  o'clock.  Do 

[  39  ] 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

try  to  come  and  thus  help  us  make  our  little 
outing  a  success. 

With  cordial  good  greetings,  believe  me, 
Yours  most  sincerely, 

Marion  S.  Blank. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Blank, 

Acceptance  It  is  so  kind  of  you  to  include  me  in  your 
theatre  party  for  Wednesday  evening  next. 
Indeed,  I  shall  be  delighted  to  come  and  will  be 
in  the  lobby  of  the  Singer  Theatre  at  the  ap- 
pointed time,  quarter  past  eight  o'clock. 

With  kindest  regards,  and  looking  forward  to 
being  with  you,  I  am, 

Cordially  yours, 

Esther  H.  Doe. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Blank, 

Regret  It  is  with  great  reluctance  that  I  send  you 
this  note  of  regret  in  answer  to  your  most  kind 
invitation  for  the  play  on  Wednesday  evening, 
March  the  sixth.  I  am  expecting  a  friend  from 
the  South  to  spend  the  week  with  me,  and  so 
will  not  be  free  that  evening. 

Appreciating  your  kindness  in  asking  me,  I 
am, 

Sincerely  yours, 

Josephine  Grew  Trout. 


THE    INVITATION 

WEDDINGS 

Formal   wedding   invitations    should    always  Weddings 
be  engraved.     They  are  issued  in  the  name  of  F°rmal 
the  bride's  parents,  or,  if  the  bride  is  an  or- 
phan, in  the  names  of  a  married  brother  and  his 
wife;  should  the  bride  be  an  only  child,  the 
nearest    relative    or  guardian  would    have    to 
officiate  in  such  a  case. 

In  the  church  wedding  the  invitation  reads, 
"requests  the  honour  of  your  presence" 
(note  that  "honour"  is  spelled  the  English  way 
with  the  "u"),  while  the  home  wedding  has  a 
slightly  varied  wording,  viz.:  "requests  the 
pleasure  of  your  company." 

The  guest's  name  is  written  upon  both  in- 
vitation, reception  or  breakfast  card,  the  inner 
envelope  unsealed,  and  the  outer  addressed  and 
stamped.  The  church  and  reception  cards  are 
enclosed  with  the  wedding  invitation.  At  home 
cards  of  a  bridal  couple  may  be  sent  separately 
after  the  wedding. 

The  wedding  invitation  is  addressed  to  Mr. 
and  Mrs.  Dash.  It  is  not  correct  to  add  and 
family,  but  to  the  unmarried  daughters  an 
invitation  is  sent  to  The  Misses,  and  a  separate 
one  to  each  of  the  sons  invited. 

Acquaintances  are  invited  only  to  the  wed- 
[  4i  1 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 


ding  ceremony;   friends   receive  the  reception 
card  also. 


Invitation 
Engraved 


MB.  AND  MBS.  BLANK  DASH 

REQUEST  THE  HONOUR  OF 


PRESENCE  AT  THE  MARRIAGE  OF  THEIR  DAUGHTER 

JANET  HELEN 


MB.  JOHN  WILLIAM  DOE 

ON  THE  EVENING  OF  MONDAY,  THE  TENTH  OF  MARCH 

AT  SIX  O'CLOCK 

AT  THE  NORTH  END  PRESBYTERIAN  CHURCH 
BEDFORD  PARK,  NEW  YORK  CITY 


or: 


MB.  AND  MBS.  BLANK  DASH 

REQUEST  THE  HONOUR  OF  YOUR  PRESENCE  AT 
THE  MARRIAGE  OF  THEIR  DAUGHTER 

JANET  HELEN 

AND 

MB.  JOHN  WILLIAM  DOE 

ON  MONDAY,  MARCH  THE  TENTH 

AT  SIX  O'CLOCK 

AT  THE  NORTH  END  PRESBYTERIAN  CHURCH, 
BEDFORD  PARK,  NEW  YORK  CITY 


[42     ] 


THE   INVITATION 

In   a   large    church    wedding,   the  engraved 
admission  card  reads: 


PLEASE  PKESEXT  THIS  CARD 

AT  THE  NORTH  END  PRESBYTERIAN  CHURCH 
ON     MONDAY,     TENTH     OF     MARCH 


The  church  wedding  invitation  needs  no 
written  acknowledgment,  except  in  rare  cases 
where  R.  S.  V.  P.  is  added  in  the  lower  left- 
hand  corner.  But  for  a  home  wedding  an 
answer  is  generally  requested,  owing  to  limited 
accommodations.  The  reply,  whether  in  ac- 
ceptance or  regret,  as  in  all  formal  invitations, 
must  follow  the  wording  of  the  one  received, 
even  as  to  date  and  place.  If  unable  to  attend 
a  wedding  where  no  reply  is  necessary,  a 
card  should  be  sent  to  the  parents  or  guar- 
dian of  the  bride  to  be  received  the  day  of  the 
wedding. 

These  invitations  should  be  sent  out  two  or 
three  weeks  before  the  wedding.  If  there  is  a 
crest  it  may  be  used,  embossed  at  the  heading 
[  43  ] 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 


of  the  invitation.    This  does  not  apply  to  other 
than  coat  of  arms  or  crests. 


MB.  AND  MBS.  BLANK  DASH 

REQUEST  THE  PLEASURE  OF 


COMPANY  AT  THE  MARRIAGE  OF  THEIR  DAUGHTER 

JANET  HELEN 

AND 

MB.  JOHN  WILLIAM  DOE 

ON  TUESDAY,  MARCH  THE  FIFTH 
AT  TWELVE  O'CLOCK 

R.S.V.P. 

FOUR  HUNDRED  WEST  NINETY-SIXTH  STREET 


Separate  cards  are  generally  enclosed  for 
the  wedding  breakfast  with  the  ceremony  in- 
vitation, as: 


MB.  AND  MBS.  BLANK  DASH 

REQUEST  THE  PLEASURE  OF 

(NAME  WRITTEN  IN) 


AT  BREAKFAST  ON  MONDAY,  JUNE  THE  FIRST 
AT  TWELVE  O'CLOCK 


[  44  ] 


THE    INVITATION 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Dash  Blank  Acceptance 

accept  with  pleasure  Bedding 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Dash's  Invitation 

kind  invitation  to  be  present 
at  the  marriage  of  their  daughter 
Janet  Helen 

and 

Mr.  John  William  Doe 
on  Tuesday,  May  the  seventh 

at  twelve  o'clock 
and  afterward  at  the  wedding  breakfast 

When  the  wedding  takes  place  in  the  country, 
card  is  generally  included,  as: 


TRAIN  LEAVES  GRAND  CENTRAL  STATION  AT 
TEN-FORTY-TWO  FOR  PLEASA.NTVILLE 


RETURN    TRAIN    LEAVES   PLEASANTVILLE  AT 
THREE-TWENTY  FOR  NEW  YORK 


Upon  arrival  motor  cars,  supplied  by  the  host, 
should  be  sent  to  meet  guests  and  to  take  them 
back  to  the  station. 

[  45  ] 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

Regret  Mr.  and  Mrs.  Dash  Blank 

regret  exceedingly  that  they 

are  unable  to  accept 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Dash's 

kind  invitation  to  be  present 

at  the  marriage  of  their  daughter 

Janet  Helen 

and 

Mr.  John  William  Doe 

on  Tuesday,  May  the  seventh 

and  afterward  at  the  wedding  breakfast 

Informal  The  informal  home  wedding  is  one  to  which 
Wedding  Only  the  immediate  family  and  close  friends  are 
invited.  These  "quiet"  weddings  generally 
take  place  when  there  has  been  a  recent  death  in 
the  family,  or  merely  from  a  preference  for  a 
small  affair.  For  these,  a  short  note  is  written 
generally  by  the  bride-elect,  as: 

My  dear  Mrs.  Blank, 

Informal       Owing   to   the    recent   death    of   my   grand- 

Invitation  mother,  Mr.  Doe  and  I  are  to  be  married  very 

quietly  at  home  on  Tuesday,  May  the  ninth,  at 

eleven  o'clock.    We  would  be  so  pleased  if  you 

and  Mr.  Blank  will  come. 

Yours  very  sincerely, 

Janet  H.  Dash. 

[  46  ] 


THE   INVITATION 

or: 

Dear  Mrs.  Blank, 

Mr.  Doe  and  I  are  to  be  married  at  home  on 
Tuesday,  May  the  ninth,  at  eleven  o'clock.  We 
are  asking  only  a  very  few  of  our  friends  to  be 
present  and  would  be  so  glad  to  have  you  and 
Mr.  Blank  here  on  that  day. 

Trusting  that  you  will  be  able  to  come,  I  am, 
Yours  very  sincerely, 

Janet  H.  Dash. 
My  dear  Miss  Dash, 

It  will  give  us  great  pleasure  to  attend  your  Acceptance 
wedding  on  Tuesday,  May  the  ninth,  at  eleven  Informal 
o'clock.    We  are  most  glad  to  be  counted  in  as 
your  close  friends. 

With  cordial  wishes  to  you  and  Mr.  Doe,  I  am 
Sincerely  yours, 

Mary  Blank. 
My  dear  Miss  Dash, 

It  is  indeed  unfortunate  that  I  shall  be  out  Regret 
of  town  the  day  of  your  wedding,  and  regret  Informal 
exceedingly  the   circumstance   which   prevents 
me  from  attending. 

Wishing  you  and  Mr.  Doe  every  happiness,  lam, 
Cordially  yours, 
Mary  V.  Howe. 

Note  that  the   invitations   speak  of  "mar-  Wedding 
riage"  while  the  replies  say  "wedding."     Mar-  Announce- 
riage  is  the  act  of  marrying,  while  wedding  is  the 
marriage  ceremony.    It  is  a  very  fine  thread  that 
denotes  the  distinction;  nevertheless  it  is  marked. 

[  47  1 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 


Engraved  wedding  announcements  are  never 
acknowledged  by  note.  A  card  sent  to  the 
bride's  parents  and  a  personal  call  upon  the  bride 
after  her  return  to  town,  if  her  new  visiting 
card  is  enclosed,  is  all  that  is  necessary. 


Announce- 
ment 


Second 
Marriage 


MR.  AND  MRS.  BLANK  DASH 

ANNOUNCE  THE  MARRIAGE  OF  THEIR  DAUGHTER 

JANET  HELEN 

TO 

MR.  JOHN  "WILLIAM  DOE 

ON  MONDAY,  MAY  THE  TENTH 


In  case  of  a  second  marriage  of  the  bride, 
the  announcement  reads  (if  she  be  a  widow) 


MR.  JOHN  WILLIAM  DOE 

AND 

MRS.  JAMES  EGBERT  HOWLAND 

ANNOUNCE  THEIR  MARRIAGE 
ON  MONDAY,  AUGUST  THE  ELEVENTH 

OJOt  THOUSAND  NINETBEX   II  t  M  .|:Hl  •  AND   I  n.  II  I  I  K  N 


If  the  bride  is  a  divorcee,  the  announcement 
reads : 

[48  ] 


THE    INVITATION 


MR.  JOHN  WILLIAM  DOE 
MRS.  ELSIE  BLANK  HOWLAND 

ANNOUNCE  THEIR  MARRIAGE 
ON  MONDAY,  AUGUST  THE  ELEVENTH 


M>l!l   II  AND  EIGHTEEN 


Sudden   death   in   the  family,  or  any  other  Recalling 
serious  cause,  is   sufficient  reason  for  recalling  Invitations 
the  invitation  or  postponing  the  wedding.    A 
small  card,  engraved  if  possible,  is  sent: 


OWING  TO  THE  SUDDEN  DEATH  OF  MR.  JOHN 
DOE'S  MOTHER,  MR  AND  MRS.  BLANK  BKG  TO  RE- 
CALL THE  INVITATIONS  FOR  THEIR  DAUGHTER'S 
WEDDING  ON  TUESDAY,  MAY  THE  NINTH. 


or: 


MR.  AND  MRS.  DASH  BLANK  BEG  TO  RECALL  Till: 
INVITATIONS  FOR  THE  MARRIAGE  OF  THEIR 
DAUGHTER,  JANET  HELEN,  AND  MH.  JOHN 
WILLIAM  DOB,  ON  TUESDAY,  MAY  THE  NINTH. 


[  49  ] 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 


or: 


MB.  AND  MIIS.  DASH  BLANK  BEG  TO  ANNOUNCE 
THAT,  OWING  TO  A  SUDDEN  DEATH  IN  THE 
FAMILT,  THE  WEDDING  OF  THE1B  DAUGHTEB, 
JANET  HELEN,  AND  MB.  JOHN  WILLIAM  DOE  IS 
POSTPONED. 


BALLS 

When  a  ball  is  to  be  given  on  a  large  scale, 
the  invitations  are  engraved  and  sent  out  from 
two  to  three  weeks  in  advance. 

The  word  "ball"  is  never  used  except  for  an 
assembly  or  charity  dance. 


Invitation 


MR.  AND  MRS.  BLANK  DASH 

REQUEST  THE    PLEASURE   OF 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Blank's 
COMPANY  AT  A  COTILLION 

TO    BE    HELD   AT  THE    HOTEL    HILTMERE 


LOCK 


657    SRAND    BOULEVARD 


THE    INVITATION 


MR.  AND  MRS,  BLANK  DASH 

REQUEST    THE    PLEASURE   OF 

YOUR  PRESENCE 

AT  A  COSTUME  DANCE 

TO    BE    GIVEN    AT   THEIR    HOME 


ON 


AT    ELEVEN    O'CLOCK 


Fit 


COMPANY   ON 
AT  


MR,  AND  MRS.  BLANK  DASH 

REQUEST  THE    PLEASURE    QF 

(NAME  TO  BE  WRITTEN  IN) 

(STATE  DATE) 


(STATE  HOUR) 


Mr.  and  Mrs.  Dash  Blank 

accept  with  pleasure 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Dash's 

very  kind  invitation  to  a  cotillion 

to  be  held  at  Hotel  Hiltmere 
On  Tuesday,  January  the  ninth 
'     at  eleven  o'clock 
[  5i   ] 


Acceptance 


THE    SOCIAL   LETTER 

or: 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Dash  Blank 

accept  with  pleasure 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Dash's 

most  kind  invitation  to  a  bal  masque 

on  the  evening  of  February  the  sixteenth 

at  eleven  o'clock 

Regret  Mr.  and  Mrs.  Dash  Blank 

regret  exceedingly  that  they 

are  unable  to  accept 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Dash's 

kind  invitation  to  attend  a  dance 

on  Tuesday,  February  the  seventeenth 

or: 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Dash  Blank 

regret  that,  owing  to  a  previous  engagement, 

they  are  unable  to  accept 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Dash's 
very  kind  invitation  to  be  present 

at  their  dance 
On  Thursday,  March  the  sixth 

Informal       For  smaller  and  more  informal   affairs,  the 
Dances  short  social  note,  or  visiting  card   with  Danc- 
ing at  ten,  March  the  third,  R.  S.  V.  P.,  is  used. 

[  52] 


THE    INVITATION 

My  dear  Mrs.  Dash, 

Will  you  and  Mr.  Dash  give  us  the  pleasure 
of  seeing  you  here  on  Saturday,  January 
seventh,  at  ten  o'clock?  We  are  planning  to 
have  a  small  dance  and  would  be  so  pleased  if 
you  would  join  us. 

In  the  hope  of  seeing  you  both  on  the  seventh, 
I  am, 

Cordially  yours, 
Mary  V.  Blank. 


MR,  AND  MRS,  BLANK  DASH 
AT  HOME 


Dancing  at  ten 
March  the  third 

R.  S.  V.  P.  657    SOUTH    STREET 


Visiting 

Card 

Invitation 


An  invitation  by  visiting  card  should  never 
be  acknowledged  by  one.  A  short  note,  as  in 
the  informal  acceptance  or  regret,  should  be 
sent  within  the  week. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Dash, 

Thank  you  so  much  for  asking  us  to  your  Acceptance 
dance   on   Tuesday,    March    the  third,  at  ten  Informal 
o'clock. 

[  53  1 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

Both  Mr.   Blank  and   I   are  most  pleased  to 
accept. 

With  cordial  good  wishes,  I  am, 

Sincerely  yours, 

Cordelia  G.  Blank, 
or: 

My  dear  Mrs.  Dash, 

As  Mr.  Blank  is  as  fond  of  dancing  as  am  I, 
we  are  both  looking  forward  with  much  pleasure 
to  being  with  you  on  Tuesday,  March  the 
third,  at  ten  o'clock. 

Yours  very  sincerely, 

Cordelia  G.  Blank. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Dash, 

Informal       Owing  to  Mr.  Blank  still  being  in  mourning, 
Regret  we  sna^  have  to  forego  the  pleasure  of  accept- 
ing your  kind  and  cordial  invitation  to  your 
dance  on  Tuesday,  March  the  third. 

Thanking  you  for  wishing  to  have  us  with 
you,  I  am, 

Very  sincerely  yours, 
Marion  V.  Blank. 

RECEPTIONS  AND  AT  HOMES 

In  most  cases  invitations  for  receptions  or 
at  homes  are  never  acknowledged  by  note. 
If  we  accept,  our  presence  there  on  the  ap- 
pointed day  is  sufficient.  If  we  are  unable  to 
attend,  our  visiting  card  is  sent  to  arrive  on  the 
day  of  the  reception,  —  except  where  an  an- 
[  54  1 


THE    INVITATION 

swer  is  explicitly  required,  then  the  reply  may 
be  as  follows: 

Mrs.  Blank  Dash  Acceptance 

accepts  with  pleasure 

Mrs.  Blank's 

kind  invitation  for  Thursday  afternoon 
October  the  thirtieth 

Mrs.  Blank  Dash 
regrets  that  she  is  unable  to  accept  Regret 

Mrs.  Blank's 

kind  invitation  for  Thursday  afternoon 
October  the  thirtieth 

Mrs.  Blank  Dash 

regrets  that  she  is 

unable  to  be  present  at 

Mrs.  Blank's 

At  home  on  Thursday  afternoon 
October  the  thirtieth 

CLUBS  AND   SOCIETIES 

The  club  or  society  invitation  is  generally 
issued  in  the  name  of  the  board  of  managers, 
board  of  governors,  or  whatever  title  may  be 
given.  If  the  club  has  an  insignia  it  is  used, 
embossed,  at  the  heading.  The  invitations  are 
always  formal  and  engraved. 
[  55  ] 


THE    SOCIAL   LETTER 


or: 


THE  BOARD  OF  GOVERNORS 

OF  THE 

NATIONAL  WELFARE  CLUB 

REQUEST  THE    PRESENCE   OF 

(NAME  WRITTEN  IN) 


AND    FRIENDS 

AT  THE  OPENING  OF  THEIR  SPRING  EXHIBITION 

ON   THE   AFTERNOON    OF   FRIDAY.    JUNE   THE   SECOND 

ONE   THOUSAND    NINETECN    HUNDRED   AND    EIGHTEEN 

FROM   THREE   UNTIL   FIVE   O'CLOCK 

DLT    REPLY    TO 
MR.    BLANK    DASH 

400    EAST  THIRD   STREET 


THE  BOARD  OF  MANAGERS  OF  THE 
NATIONAL  WELFARE  CLUB 

HAS   THE    HONOR  TO    INVITE 
(NAME  WRITTEN  IN) 


TO  A  CONFERENCE  TO  BE  HELD 

AT    FOUR   O'CLOCK 

HE   AFTERNOON   OF  THURSDAY.   JUNE    1STH 
AT  THE   SOCIETY'S   BUILDING 

145   CIVIC   SQUARE 


[56     J 


THE    INVITATION 


Mrs.  Dash  Blank 

accepts  with  pleasure 

The  Board  of  Managers  of  the 

National  Welfare  Club's 

kind  invitation  for  Thursday  afternoon 

June  the  eighteenth 


Acceptance 


Mrs.  Dash  Blank 

regrets  that  she  is  unable  to  accept 

The  Board  of  Governors 

of  the 

National  Welfare  Club's 
kind  invitation  for  Tuesday  afternoon,  June  i8th 

Where  the  invitation  reads : 


Regret 


MRS.  BLANK  DASH 

MRS,  BLANK'S 

PRESENCE  ON  TUESDAY  AFTERNOON. JUNE   1BTH 
TO  MEET  THE  BOARD  OF  GOVERNORS 

OF  THE 

NATIONAL  WELFARE  SOCIETY 

FROM    FOUR   TO   SEVEN    O'CLOCK 


[  57  ] 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

Mrs.  Dash  Blank 
accepts  with  pleasure 

Mrs.  Dash's 

kind  invitation  to  meet 

The  Board  of  Governors  of  the 

National  Welfare  Society 
On  Tuesday  afternoon,  June  i8th 

Regret  Mrs.  Dash  Blank 

regrets  that  a  previous  engagement 
prevents  her  from  accepting 

Mrs.  Dash's 

kind  invitation  to  meet 

The  Board  of  Governors  of  the  National  Welfare 

Society 
On  Tuesday,  June  the  eighteenth 

GARDEN  PARTIES 

Garden  parties  are,  for  the  most  part,  in- 
formal affairs,  and  many  times  the  at  home 
visiting  card  is  used  with  the  words,  Garden 
Party,  Thursday,  June  the  second,  from  four  to 
seven  o'clock,  written  on  the  lower  left-hand  side. 
If  one  happens  to  be  very  friendly,  do  try  and 
come  may  be  added  at  the  top  of  the  card. 

If  it  happens  to  be  a  very  large  and  formal 
affair  a  formal  engraved  invitation  is  issued 
[  58  ] 


THE   INVITATION 

and  answered  in  kind.  But  this  is  rare,  so 
examples  are  not  given  here.  The  garden 
party  holds  the  place  in  society  of  an  "at 
home"  held  out  of  doors. 

HOUSE  OR  WEEK-END  PARTIES 

The  week-end  visit  differs  from  the  house 
party  in  that  the  visitor  knows  that  he  is  ex- 
pected to  come  on  Friday  or  Saturday  and 
leave  on  the  following  Monday  morning.  The 
house  party,  on  the  other  hand,  might  mean 
that  the  guest  is  to  stay  one  or  possibly  two 
weeks.  So  the  hostess,  in  writing  her  invita- 
tions, may  mention  the  special  cause,  if  there 
be  one,  such  as,  over  Thanksgiving,  or  to  meet 
a  certain  friend,  etc.  She  will  say  a  word  or 
so  regarding  any  sports  to  be  indulged  in,  so 
that  the  guest  may  come  equipped  with  bath- 
ing-suit, golf  clubs,  tennis  racket,  skates,  etc., 
and  a  word  is  given  about  social  entertain- 
ments as  a  hint  as  to  the  kind  of  clothes  to 
bring.  She  will  enclose  a  time-table,  indicating 
the  best  train. 

My  dear  Miss  James, 

I    am   asking   a   few   friends   over   the   next  Invitation 
week-end   and  would   be   so  glad   if  you   can 
manage  to  come. 

[  59  ] 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

As  the  ice  on  Tinker's  Pond  is  at  its  best, 
I  am  giving  you  but  short  notice,  fearing  a 
warm  spell  may  come  to  prevent  us  from  skat- 
ing there. 

John  Doe  and  his  sister,  I  hope,  will  be  here, 
and  I  am  asking  only  those  who  I  know  will  be 
congenial,  so  do  come  and  help  us  have  a  jolly 
time. 

Bring  your  warmest  wraps  as  we  will  be  do- 
ing quite  a  bit  of  motoring  also. 

As  this  is  very  impromptu,  I  intend  to  have  it 
most  informal,  so  do  not  feel  that  you  must 
bring  evening  clothes. 

I  am  enclosing  a  time-table.  You  will  see 
that  I  have  underscored  the  3.32,  as  it  is  the 
best  afternoon  train. 

Let  me  hear  from  you  at  an  early  date  that 
I  may  expect  you  on  Saturday. 

With  best  wishes,  I  am, 

Very  cordially  yours, 

Mary  Blank. 

My  dear  Miss  Blank, 

Acceptance  Your  invitation  to  come  to  you  next  Satur- 
day for  the  week-end  is  far  too  alluring  to  re- 
fuse. It  is  most  kind  of  you  to  include  me  in 
your  little  party.  My  skates  stand  ready 
and  shall  be  the  first  things  to  go  into  my 
bag. 

I  shall  pray  that  this  glorious  cold  spell  con- 
tinues until,  at  least,  after  we  have  all  enjoyed 
Tinker's  Pond. 

Many  thanks  for  your  thoughtfulness  in  en- 

[  60  ] 


THE    INVITATION 

closing  the  time-table.     I  shall  take  the  3.32 
train  as  you  suggest. 

In  anticipation  of  seeing  you  next  Saturday, 
I  am, 

Cordially  yours, 

Edith  James. 

My  dear  Miss  Blank, 

My  desire  is  to  write  an  acceptance  to  your  Regret 
tempting  invitation  to  spend  the  next  week- 
end with  you,  but  unfortunately  I  must  put  it 
aside  and  send  my  regrets  instead. 

The  latter  part  of  the  week  is  filled  with  en- 
gagements which  I  dare  not  break.  An  im- 
portant dinner  comes  on  Saturday  night  and 
friends  are  due  here  to  spend  Sunday  with  me. 
So  you  see  I  am  tied  completely.  It  was  most 
kind  of  you  to  think  of  me  in  planning  your 
little  party,  and  I  greatly  appreciate  having 
been  invited. 

Hoping  tb  see  you  in  the  very  near  future, 
I  am, 

Very  cordially  yours, 

Mary  V.  Dash. 

Upon  our  return  from  the  week-end  or  house  "  The 
party,  courtesy  demands   that  a  note  be  sent  Bread-aud- 
io our  hostess,  expressing  our  appreciation  of  fUtter» 
the  hospitality  received.     This  kind  of  letter  is 
known  by  the  quaint  term  of  "The  Bread-and- 
Butter  Letter." 

[  61  ] 


THE    SOCIAL   LETTER 

My  dear  Miss  Blank, 

Having  arrived  safely  home,  my  first  thought 
is  to  write  and  tell  you  again  how  very  much  I 
enjoyed  the  perfectly  splendid  week-end  I  had 
with  you.  The  memory  of  those  good  times 
will  afford  me  many  delightful  moments  for  a 
long  time  to  come.  It  was  so  good  of  you  to 
have  included  me  in  your  jolly  little  party. 

With  kindest  greeting  to  you  and  your 
brother,  I  am, 

Yours  very  cordially, 

Ethel  V.  Doe. 
or: 
My  dear  Miss  Blank, 

Sitting  again  in  my  office  I  wonder  if,  after 
all,  those  delightful  two  days  spent  in  your 
charming  home  were  but  a  dream. 

I  want  to  thank  you  again  for  your  kind  and 
cordial  hospitality. 

Hoping  soon  to  have  the  pleasure  of  seeing 
you  in  town,  I  am, 

Sincerely  yours, 

David  B.  Vorse. 


Dear  Edith, 

We  arrived  home  still  breathless  from  the 
exhilaration  of  those  wonderful  days  spent  with 
you.  You  were  a  dear  to  give  us  such  a  jolly 
time,  and  John  and  I  are  looking  forward  to  the 
time  when  you  can  come  and  spend  a  while 
with  us.  Although  we  have  no  glorious  lake 
[  62  ] 


THE   INVITATION 

for  skating,  we  may,  perhaps,  be  able  to  find  a 
few  other  pastimes  to  interest  you  in  our  big 
city,  although  I  know  that  anything  short  of 
Tinker's  Pond  will  prove  a  poor  substitute. 

Thank  you,  dear  girl,  for  having  us  with  you. 
John  joins  me  in  sending  best  regards  to  all  the 
family. 

Affectionately  yours, 

Mary  K.  Grainer. 


My  dear  Miss  Blank, 

Tinker's  Corners  is  a  landmark  in  my  small 
geography  of  "special  selections."  I  am  sure 
that  the  others  whom  you  entertained  so 
royally  last  week  must  feel  as  I  do.  The 
warmth  of  your  hospitality  will  leave  a  glow 
in  our  memory  for  some  time  to  come.  With 
kindest  greeting  to  your  dear  mother  and 
brother,  I  am, 

Cordially  yours, 

Helen  D.  Westvale. 

Very  many  times  an  invitation  is  given  over  Reminders 
the  telephone,  or  en  passant.     Upon  our  return 
home,  we  intend  to  write  this  invitation  down 
in  our  engagement  book,  —  and  forget  to  do  so. 
In  the  meantime,  the  hostess  is  preparing  for  our 
coming.    The  day  arrives  and  we  are  —  where? 
It  is  a  most  awkward  situation  for  us;  and  for 
our  hostess  it  is  more  than  trying. 
[  63  ] 


THE    SOCIAL   LETTER 

The  way  to  obviate  this  possibility  is  for 
the  hostess-elect  to  follow  up  her  verbal  in- 
vitation by  a  "reminder"  note.  This  safe- 
guards her,  at  all  events,  for  she  has  then  done 
all  she  can  to  insure  our  coming.- 

Then,  also,  the  verbal  invitation  alone,  often 
leaves  the  guest  in  doubt:  "Did  Mrs.  Dash 
say  dinner  at  half  past  seven  or  eight?"  We 
take  a  chance  that  it  was  for  eight  and  arrive 
half  an  hour  late;  or,  "Was  it  the  seventh  or 
ninth  that  Mrs.  Dash  asked  us  for  dinner?" 
We  go  on  the  seventh  and  —  embarrassment 
ensues.  We  appear  in  our  dinner  dress,  and 
find  Mrs.  Dash  wholly  unprepared  to  receive  us. 
Therefore,  the  necessity  of  the  "reminder." 

If  the  dinner  is  a  formal  affair,  though  the 
invitation  has  been  given  verbally,  the  word 
"reminder"  is  added  in  the  upper  left-hand 
corner  to  the  regular  engraved  or  written  in- 
vitation. If  it  is  an  informal  affair,  a  social 
note  is  sent  as: 

My  dear  Mrs.  Blank, 

This  is  to  remind  you  that  I  am  looking  for- 
ward to  having  you  and  Mr.  Blank  dine  with 
us  on  Tuesday,  May  the  sixth,  at  eight  o'clock. 
I  am  so  glad  you  will  be  able  to  come. 
Yours  very  sincerely, 

Mary  B.  Dash. 

[  64  ] 


THE   INVITATION 

The  "reminder"  is  sent  as  a  "follow-up"  in 
any  kind  of  an  invitation. 

If,  for  any  reason,  it  becomes  necessary  for  a  Canceling 
hostess  to  cancel  or  postpone  a  dinner,  etc.,  she  invitation 
must  send  out  a  letter  to  each  guest  either  by 
messenger  or  special  delivery,  when  she  does 
not  wish  to  use  the  telephone.     This  must  be 
done  as  soon  as  possible.    If  the  invitation  was 
formal,  the  cancellation  should  be  also;  if  in- 
formal, a  short  note  must  be  written. 

Owing  to  a  sudden  death  (or  illness)  Formal 

in  the  family 

Mr.  and  Mrs.  Blank  Dash 

will  be  unable  to  entertain  their  friends 

at  dinner  on  Tuesday,  March  the  seventeenth 

My  dear  Mrs.  Blank, 

Owing  to  the  sudden  illness  (or  death)  of  Mr.  Informal 
Dash's  mother,  I  regret  that  we  must  recall  the 
invitations  for  the  dinner  we  had  planned  for 
Tuesday,  March  the  seventeenth. 
Yours  sincerely, 

Mary  B.  Dash. 

Upon  receipt  of  either  of  the  above  notes, 
those  invited  should  call  and  inquire,  in  case  of 
illness,  after  the  health  of  Mr.  Dash's  mother 
or,  in  case  of  death,  pay  a  visit  of  condolence. 
[  65  ] 


THE    SOCIAL   LETTER 

Breaking       If,  on  the  other  hand,  the  invited  guest  is 

Engage-  unable  to  attend  a  function  he  or  she  has  ac- 

fns  cepted  previously,  a  note  must  be  sent  at  once 

by    messenger    or    special    delivery,  —  or    by 

telegram,  if  a  telephone  is  not  handy,  explaining 

the  reason  for  having  to  break  the  engagement. 

The  note  would  run: 


My  dear  Mrs.  Dash, 

An  unforeseen  and  most  unwelcome  circum- 
stance prevents  us  from  dining  with  you  on 
Friday,  November  the  sixteenth. 

Mr.  Blank  has  been  called  to  Connecticut 
on  an  important  business  matter  which  will 
detain  him  several  days.  I  intend  going  also 
as  the  matter  is  of  importance  to  me  as  well. 

We  are  most  distressed  to  have  to  notify  you 
at  the  last  moment,  but  I  know  you  will  un- 
derstand and  appreciate  the  situation. 

In  sincere  disappointment,  I  remain, 
Yours  very  sincerely, 

Mary  B.  Blank. 


My  dear  Mrs.  Dash, 

A  great  affliction  has  just  come  to  us  in  the 
sudden  death  of  my  brother.  I  must  therefore 
write  to  tell  you  that  we  shall  be  unable  to 
have  dinner  with  you  on  Wednesday,  October 
the  twentieth,  as  we  had  anticipated. 

[  66  ] 


THE    INVITATION 

Trusting  that  writing  at  this  late  hour  will 
not  put  you  to  too  much  inconvenience,  I  am, 
Yours  very  sincerely, 

Helen  T.  Grew. 

Very  often  the  closest  friend  of  the  bride-  Invitation 
elect  plans   a   "linen   shower"   for  her.     The  (?« 
letter  is  always  written  informally. 

My  dear  Miss  Doe, 

I  am  planning  to  give  a  "linen  shower"  for 
Jane  Blank  on  Thursday,  the  sixth,  at  four 
o'clock.  Will  you  not  come  and  bring  a  linen 
gift  with  you? 

If  you  can  manage  to  be  here  by  half  past 
three  it  will  give  us  time  to  arrange  all  the 
presents  before  Jane  comes,  as  she  is  not  to 
know  anything  about  it. 

Hoping  to  see  you  on  Thursday,  I  remain, 
Cordially  yours, 

Emily  S.  Dawson. 

My  dear  Miss  Dawson, 

Indeed,  you  can  count  on  me  for  Thursday,  Acceptance 
the  sixth.     I  will  be  at  your  home  at  half  past 
three,  promptly,  with  my  little  remembrance. 
With  best  wishes,  I  am, 

Sincerely  yours, 

Florence  Doe. 

My  dear  Miss  Dawson, 

As  I  expect  to  be  out  of  town  on  Thursday  Regret 
next,  I  regret  I  shall  be  unable  to  be  with  you 

[  67  ] 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

on  that  day.    I  will,  however,  send  my  gift  for 
Jane  to  your  home  by  half  past  three. 
With  kind  and  cordial  good  wishes,  I  am, 
Very  sincerely  yours, 

Dorothy  Tree. 


CHILDREN'S  PARTIES 

Invitation  A  very  charming  card  may  be  had,  with  a 
small  illustration  above  or  in  the  corner.  It 
reads,  "Won't  you  come  to  my  party?"  or 
words  to  that  effect.  The  card  is  folded  and 
upon  the  other  side  is  a  detachable  answer- 
blank  for  the  reply. 

All  that  is  very  simple  for  the  one  giving  the 
party,  provided  she  find  such  a  card,  but 
where  this  boon  is  not  within  reach,  there  must 
be  the  written  note.  So  the  mother  or  guar- 
dian writes  to  the  parent  or  guardian  of  the 
child  invited  somewhat  in  this  strain: 

My  dear  Mrs.  Blank, 

We  are  planning  to  give  a  little  party  for 
Edward  on  Friday,  the  seventeenth,  and  he  is 
particularly  anxious  to  have  Ethel  come. 

I  do  hope  it  can  be  arranged,  for  he  would  be 
so  disappointed  not  to  have  her  among  his  little 
guests. 

If  the  nurse  will  bring  her  at  half  past  two, 
she  will  be  in  ample  time. 

[  68  ] 


THE    INVITATION 

Trusting  to  have  the  pleasure  of  seeing  your 
little  girl  here,  I  am,  with  kind  regards, 
Sincerely  yours, 

Mary  B.  Black. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Black, 

It  is  most  kind  of  you  to  ask  Ethel  to  Acceptance 
Edward's  party  on  Friday,  the  seventeenth,  and 
I  am  very  glad  to  be  able  to  accept  for  her. 
She  is  looking  forward  with  much  eagerness  to 
the  event,  and  will  be  at  your  home  at  half  past 
two  o'clock. 

With  kind  wishes,  I  am, 

Cordially  yours, 

Margaret  Blank. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Blank, 

As   Ethel   is   just  recovering  from  a   heavy  Regret 
cold,  the  doctor  fears  that  it  would  be  impru- 
dent to  take  her  out  just  at  present. 

I  am  so  very  sorry  on  the  poor  child's  ac- 
count to  have  to  decline  your  kind  invitation 
for  Edward's  party  on  the  seventeenth. 

Thanking  you  for  your  kindness  in  asking  her, 
believe  me, 

Cordially  yours, 

Margaret  Blank. 


INVITATION  TO   STRANGERS 

If  we  wish  to  bring  a  friend  whom  we  think 
the  hostess  would  enjoy  having,  it  is  permis- 
[  69  ] 


THE    SOCIAL   LETTER 

sible  to  write  and  ask  this  privilege  only  when 
a  dance  or  at  home  is  held. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Doe, 

Request  Would  it  be  presuming  too  greatly  to  ask  if 
I  might  bring  my  friend  Mr.  Alfred  Soley  of 
Ontario  with  me  on  Tuesday  evening,  March 
the  fourth?  He  is  a  charming  fellow  whom  I 
feel  sure  you  will  find  most  congenial. 

If  you  are  unable  to  grant  me  this  request, 
please  tell  me  frankly  and  I  will  understand. 

At  any  event,  hoping  to  see  you  on  the  fourth, 
I  am, 

Yours  sincerely, 

Harold  V.  Brooks. 

My  dear  Mr.  Brooks, 

Acceptance  I  shall  be  very  glad  to  welcome  your  friend, 
Mr.  Soley,  among  my  guests  on  the  fourth. 
My  acquaintance  with  the  few  Canadians  I 
have  been  fortunate  to  meet  assures  me  already 
that  I  shall  find  him  as  charming  as  you 
say. 

With  kind  greetings,  I  am, 

Sincerely  yours, 

Margaret  V.  Doe. 

Regret  My  dear  Mr.  Brooks, 

It  would  give  me  great  pleasure  to  include 
your  friend  among  my  guests  on  the  fourth,  but, 
unfortunately,  my  place  is  so  small  that  I  fear 
we  shall  be  somewhat  crowded  as  it  is. 

I  hope  at  some  other  time  I  may  have  the 

[  70  ] 


THE    INVITATION 

opportunity  of  meeting  Mr.  Soley  and  trust 
you  will  forgive,  and  understand,  my  seeming 
inhospitality. 

With  kind  regards,  I  am, 

Yours  sincerely, 

Margaret  V.  Doe. 


B 


CHAPTER  III 
THE  LETTER  OF  THANKS 

ROADLY  speaking,  there  are  three  dis- 
tinct kinds  of  duty  letters:  the  letter  of 
thanks,  the  letter  of  congratulation  and  the 
letter  of  condolence.  Like  the  small  boy  who 
puts  off  the  most  difficult  task  until  the  last, 
the  letter  of  condolence,  requiring  more  thought, 
has  been  placed  at  the  end. 

The  letter  of  thanks  should  never  be  delayed, 

but  sent  as  soon  as  possible  after  the  gift  or 

favor,  etc.,  has  been  received.    Excuses  are  but 

thin  butter  with  which  to  cover  our  neglect. 

The       "Looking  a  gift  horse  in  the  mouth"  is  poor 

Cheerful  SpOrt;  once  we  descend  to  counting  his  teeth 

we  lose  the  jpy  and   spontaneity  that  should 

send  us  rushing  for  our  pens  and  cause  the  ink 

to  flow  rapidly  in  our  expressions  of  pleasure  at 

the  receipt  of  the  gift. 

It  is  the  spirit  that  counts  every  time. 
Of  Bride       There  is  the  letter  of  thanks  that  the  bride 
for  Wedding  must  send  as  soon  as  she  can  after  the  receipt 
^    of  a  gift.    It  must  be  written  by  her,  no  matter 
[  72  ] 


LETTER   OF   THANKS 

how  rushed  she  may  be,  for  the  effect  of  receiv- 
ing a  note  of  thanks  from  anyone  other  than 
the  recipient  of  the  gift  is  not  only  unpardon- 
able, except  in  case  of  illness,  but  shuts  the 
door  of  gratitude  with  a  bang  in  the  face  of 
the  giver.  A  good  and  true  maxim  to  bear  in 
mind  is  that  if  we  really  want  to  do  a  thing, 
we  can  always  find  the  time. 

In  a  case  where  the  wedding  is  hurried, 
through  change  of  plans,  or  where  gifts  come 
at  the  eleventh  hour,  the  bride  is  excused  from 
answering  until  after  her  honeymoon.  In  any 
event  she  must  acknowledge  the  gift  both  for 
herself  and  for  her  husband,  or  husband-elect. 


My  dear  Mrs.  Dash, 

It  was  most  kind  and  thoughtful  of  you  and 
Mr.  Dash  to  send  us  that  lovely  vase.     Both  Acknowl- 
Mr.  Doe  and  I  are  more  than  delighted  to  have  edgment 
it.     He  wishes  to  join  me  in  thanking  you  for 
your  kind  thought  of  us. 

Hoping  to  see  you  at  our  wedding,  I  am, 
Yours  very  cordially, 

Mary  H.  Graves. 


My  dear  Miss  Dash, 

The  oyster  forks  are  beautiful  and  just  ex- 
actly what  we  wanted.    It  was  very  kind  of  you 

[  73   ] 


THE   SOCIAL   LETTER 

to  remember  us  so  charmingly.    John  joins  me 
in  thanks  and  deep  appreciation  for  your  gift. 

With  cordial  good  wishes,  I  remain, 

Always  sincerely  yours, 

Mary  H.  Graves. 
My  dear  Mrs.  Roe, 

The  cake  basket  has  just  arrived,  and  I  feel 
that  I  must  sit  right  down  and  tell  you  how 
lovely  it  is  and  how  delighted  we  are  to  re- 
ceive it.  Mr.  Doe  joins  me  in  warmest  thanks 
and  appreciation  of  your  kindness  to  us. 

Hoping  to  see  you  very  soon  after  our  return 
to  town,  I  am, 

Most  sincerely  yours, 

Mary  H.  Graves. 
Dear  Mabel, 

Your  lovely  gift  awaited  us  upon  our  return 
to  town  yesterday.  The  sofa  cushion  is  a 
dream  of  beauty  and  helps  greatly  to  adorn  our 
little  home.  I  know  that  I  shall  have  hard 
work  keeping  John  from  making  it  his  special 
possession. 

Thank  you  so  much,  dear,  for  giving  us  such 
a  lovely  and  useful  gift. 

John  joins  with  me  in  deep  appreciation  of 
your   thoughtfulness,    and    hopes  to    see   you 
in  our  little  home  in  the  very  near  future. 
Yours  affectionately, 

Mary  Graves  Doe. 
Dear  Mrs.  James, 

Upon  our  return  to  town  on  Friday  AVC  found 
your  beautiful  flower  dish  awaiting  us.  It  was 

[  74  1 


LETTER    OF   THANKS 

so  kind  of  you  to  send  it,  and  both  my  husband 
and  I  deeply  appreciate  your  thoughtfulness. 

You  must  surely  come  soon  and  see  for  your- 
self how  lovely  it  looks  on  our  dining-room 
table. 

With  many  thanks,  I  remain, 

Very  sincerely  yours, 

Mary  G.  Doe. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Trevor, 

Please  forgive  my  seeming  neglect  in  not 
acknowledging  your  lovely  electrolier  before, 
but  our  plans  were  changed,  as  you  know,  at  the 
last  moment,  and  we  were  unable  even  to  open 
any  of  our  wedding  gifts  before  leaving  town. 
We  returned  last  Friday,  and  I  am  taking  the 
very  first  opportunity  to  write  and  tell  you 
how  greatly  we  appreciate  your  gift  and  thank 
you  for  your  kind  thought  of  us. 

Hoping  you  will  understand  the  reason  for 
the  delay,  I  remain, 

Most  sincerely  yours, 

Mary  G.  Doe. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Rogers, 

You  and  Mr.  Rogers  are  more  than  kind  to 
send  us  such  a  beautiful  clock,  and  Mr.  Doe 
and  I  wish  to  thank  you  ever  so  much  for 
your  thought  of  us.  Every  time  the  little 
clock  chimes  the  passing  of  another  happy  hour 
in  our  new  nest,  we  think  of  you. 

I  do  hope  that  when  you  find  yourself  in 

[  75  1 


THE    SOCIAL   LETTER 

this  neighborhood  you  will  drop  in  and  see  for 
yourself  how  fine  our  new  possession  looks. 
With  warm  thanks  from  us  both,  believe  me, 
Always  cordially  yours, 

Mary  G.  Doe. 

To  facilitate  acknowledging  gifts,  it  is  a  good 
plan  for  the  bride  to  have  a  book  or  list  with 
gifts  noted  and  donor  named,  and  as  each 
present  is  acknowledged,  it  may  be  checked  off. 
This  will  prevent  any  error  either  in  forgetting 
to  write  or  misnaming  the  gift  received. 

CHRISTMAS  GIFTS 

My  dear  Mr.  Blank, 

Letter  from       It  was  more  than  kind  of  you  to  remember 

Employee  me  so  handsomely  with  the  check  that  awaited 

to  Employer  me   this   morning.      Please   accept  my  thanks 

and  know   how  much  I  appreciate  your  kind 

thought  of  me. 

With  all  good  wishes  for  the  coming  year  to 
you  and  yours,  I  am, 

Gratefully  yours, 

John  W.  Doe. 

My  dear  Mr.  Blank, 

Your  kind  gift  reached  me  with  my  other 
Christmas  presents  this  morning.  It  makes  me 
truly  grateful  for  your  remembrance  of  me  with 
your  generous  check. 

Please  accept  my  thanks  and   appreciation 

[  76  ] 


LETTER    OF    THANKS 

of  your  kindness,  and  believe  me,  with  all  the 
Season's  good  wishes, 

Yours  respectfully, 

John  W.  Doe. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Dash, 

Christmas    was    doubly    a    day   of    rejoicing   To  Ac- 
with  all  the  beautiful  gifts  that  came  to  me;  quaintance 
not  the  least  lovely  of  which  was  your  beauti- 
ful work  bag.    Thank  you  so  much  for  your 
great  kindness  in  thinking  of  me. 

With  every  good  wish  for  the  coming  year, 
I  remain, 

Most  cordially  yours, 

Mary  G.  Doe. 

Dear  Mrs.  Blank, 

Your  lovely  painting  stands  in  all  its  beauty 
among  my  Christmas  gifts,  and  will  adorn 
my  wall  upon  the  very  first  opportunity  I  can 
find. 

How  very  thoughtful  and  kind  of  you  to  re- 
member my  preference,  in  your  selection. 

With  many  thanks  and  cordial  good  wishes 
for  the  season,  believe  me, 

Yours  most  cordially, 

Mary  G.  Doe. 

My  dear  Mr.  Rowe, 

Many,  many  thanks  for  your  kind  remem- 
brance which  arrived  Christmas  morning. 
Your  lovely  book  will  make  a  valuable  addi- 
tion to  my  small  but  growing  library,  besides 

[  77  ] 


THE   SOCIAL   LETTER 

affording  me  some  happy  hours  in  the  reading 
of  it. 

With  heartiest  good  wishes  for  a  Happy  New 
Year,  I  am, 

Cordially  yours, 

Janet  H.  Blank. 

Dear  Mabel, 

Expected  gifts  are  a  great  joy,  but  unexpected 
remembrances  prove  a  greater  pleasure,  as  they 
bring  the  unlooked-for  thought  with  them.  Thank 
you  so  much  for  the  calendar.  I  display  it  with 
great  pride  as  being  both  lovely  and  unique. 

With  best  wishes  to  all  at  home  for  the  com- 
ing year,  I  am, 

Affectionately  yours, 

Janet  H.  Blank. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Blank, 

To  It  is  with  the  deepest  gratitude  that  I  write 
Benefactor  to  thank  you  for  your  lovely  gift.  The  arm- 
chair is  not  only  useful  and  an  adornment  to 
my  little  room,  but  will  stand  as  a  further 
sign  of  your  many  great  kindnesses  to  me  and 
mine. 

With  every  good  wish  to  you  and  Mr.  Blank 
for  a  joyous  and  prosperous  New  Year,  I  am, 
Yours  ever  gratefully, 

Mary  R.  Rowe. 

My  dear  Mr.  Blank, 

Again  an  evidence  of  your  great  kindness 
has  come  to  me  with  the  check  which  I  received 
on  Christmas  day. 

[  78  ] 


LETTER   OF   THANKS 

The  words  to  express  my  thanks  as  I  would, 
are  so  inadequate  that  I  feel  wordless  when  I 
would  write  you  to  the  fullest,  of  my  gratitude. 

Please  know  that  these  few  words  of  thanks 
have  behind  them  the  deepest  appreciation  a 
man  can  feel  for  your  many  kindnesses  both 
now  and  in  the  past. 

I  sincerely  hope  that  the  rich  promises  for 
the  New  Year  will  be  fulfilled  to  the  uttermost 
for  you  and  yours, 

Gratefully  and  respectfully  yours, 

Harold  B.  Rowe. 

Dear  Mabel, 

How  cruel  of  you  to  remember  the  passing   77^ 
time  so  accurately,  but  how  kind  to  do  it  in  Birthday 
such  a  charming  way.     I  feel  the  edge  is  quite  Letter 
taken  off  by  your  birthday  gift.     The  beauti- 
ful buckle  is  a  "joy  forever." 
Thank  you,  dear,  so  very  much. 

Affectionately  yours, 

Mary  G.  Doe. 

My  dear  Helen, 

I  thought  I  had  kept  the  fact  that  I  was 
having  a  birthday  a*  profound  secret,  but  your 
lovely  book  showed  me  that  the  "cat  was  out 
of  the  bag."  It  was  most  kind  of  you  to  re- 
member me,  and  I  anticipate  many  delightful 
hours  reading  it. 

Thank  you  so  much, 

Affectionately  yours, 

Mary  G.  Doe. 

[  79  ] 


THE   SOCIAL   LETTER 

Dear  Margaret, 

I  thought  I  had  announced  publicly  that  I 
was  having  no  more  birthdays,  yet  lo  and 
behold,  your  gift  arrived  early  to  remind  me 
that  I  may  not  dodge  the  fact.  The  bar 
pin  is  far  too  lovely  to  have  me  scold  you 
as  I  should,  so,  instead,  I'll  tell  you  how 
delighted  I  am  with  it,  and  thank  you  very 
much. 

Let  me  see  you  soon.  With  fond  love,  I 
am, 

Always  affectionately  yours, 

Mary  G.  Doe. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Rowe, 

Thank  you  so  much  for  your  lovely  birth- 
day gift.  How  good  of  you  to  remember  me 
so  charmingly.  I  shall  put  the  pretty  hand- 
kerchiefs into  immediate  use,  and  be  the  envy 
of  all  around  me. 

With  every  cordial  wish,  I  am, 

Yours  most  sincerely, 

Mary  G.  Doe. 

WEDDING  ANNIVERSARIES 


i  year.  . 
5  years 

10     "... 
12      "... 

15  "... 

20      "... 

.  .Paper  wedding 
.  .Wooden  wedding 
.  .  Tin  wedding 
.  .  Leather  wedding 
.  .  Crystal  wedding 
.  .China  wedding 

25  years  . 
30 
40       "  .  . 
45       " 
50 
60-75".. 

.  Silver  wedding 
.  Ivory  wedding 
.  Woolen  wedding 
.  Silk  wedding 
.  Golden  wedding 
.Diamond  wedding 

[  80] 


LETTER    OF    THANKS 

My  dear  Mrs.  Dash, 

We  were  quite  taken  by  surprise  by  your  lovely  On  Fifth 
gift  on  the  occasion  of  our  fifth  anniversary,  and   Year  An- 
were  deeply  touched  by  your  kind  thought  of  us.   niversary 

Life  has  been  so  generous  that  we  have  both  Gift 
said  it  seems  but  yesterday  that  we  were  ac- 
knowledging our  wedding  gifts. 

I  can  ask  for  nothing  better  for  our  friends 
than  that  they  may  have  the  same  happy  ex- 
perience that  has  been  John's  and  mine. 

Thank  you  so  much,  dear  Mrs.  Dash,  for 
the  charming  book-rack.  When  you  come"  to 
see  us,  which  I  hope  will  be  soon,  you  will  see 
that  I  have  put  it  into  immediate  use. 

John  joins  me  in  very  kindest  regards  and 
appreciation  of  your  kindness. 

Yours  always  cordially, 

Helen  V.  Rowe. 

Dear  Mrs.  Blank, 

With  all  your  many  interests,  how  good  of  On 
you  to  remember  us  on  our  silver  anniversary,  acknowledg- 
Now  that  it  is  past  we  begin  to  feel  that  we  are  ^nS  Gift  for 
a  very  old  couple  indeed.  ifST1/ 

Thank  you,  my  dear,  for  your  sweet  gift  and  vfr    •  °^ 
the  kind  thought  that  accompanied  it.     The  * 
silver  paper-knife  is  exquisite. 

My  best  wish  for  you  is  that  you  also  will 
attain  a  silver  anniversary  under  auspices  as 
kindly  and  beautiful  as  ours  has  been.  It  is 
a  wonderful  feeling  to  know  that  we  have  both 
weathered  some  of  life's  storms  and  put  our 
ship  into  port  safe  and  sound  each  time. 

[  81  ] 


THE    SOCIAL   LETTER 

Mr.  Rowe  joins  me  in  expressing  his  deep 
appreciation  of  your  kindness. 
With  all  good  wishes,  believe  me, 

Always  yours  sincerely, 

Helen  V.  Rowe. 

My  dear  Mr.  Roberts, 

For  Favor  It  was  characteristic  of  you  to  go  to  all  that 
Received  trouble  of  talking  personally  to  Mr.  Doe  on  my 
behalf.  A  few  words  from  you  will  have  more 
weight  in  furthering  my  cause  than  endless 
communications  from  others.  I  had  no  idea  I 
was  to  be  so  fortunate. 

Believe  me,  I  am  most  grateful  for  all  your 
kindness  to  me  in  this  matter. 
In  deep  appreciation,  I  remain, 
Sincerely  yours, 

Harold  F.  Weekes. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Smith, 

Your  letter  enclosing  the  list  of  names  of  the 
pew-holders  of  St.  Francis'  Church  came  to 
me  yesterday.  I  realize  by  its  length  the 
amount  of  work  I  caused  you.  Believe  me,  I 
am  truly  grateful  and  know  that  your  interest 
in  this  matter  will  aid  me  materially  in  my  work. 
Thank  you  so  very  much. 

With  kindest  regards,  I  am, 

Yours  gratefully, 

Mary  Blank  Rowe. 

My  dear  Mr.  Howe, 

Through  your  great  kindness  I  was  able  to 
secure  the  position  as  secretary  to  the  comp- 
[  82  ] 


LETTER    OF    THANKS 

troller.  I  know  you  must  realize,  more  than 
these  words  can  convey,  how  much  this  means 
to  me,  and  how  very  grateful  I  am  to  you  for 
speaking  to  Mr.  Street  in  my  behalf. 

My  thanks  will  lie,  not  only  in  words,  but 
in  the  effort  I  shall  make  to  prove  worthy  of 
your  faith  in  my  ability. 

With  sincere  good  wishes  and  deep  appre- 
ciation, I  am, 

Gratefully  yours, 

George  F.  Small. 

Dear  Mrs.  White, 

How  good  of  you  to  have  made  the  lovely  For  Gift 
coverlid    for    my    baby.      Knowing    how    ex-  to  Baby 
tremely  busy  you  always  are,  I  appreciate  it 
so  much  more,  and  am  very  grateful  to  you  for 
sending  it. 

Won't  you  run  in  some  time  soon  and  see  how 
sweet  your  handiwork  looks  tucked  around  my 
little  one? 

With  many  thanks,  I  am, 

Cordially  yours, 

Martha  Todd  Rowe. 

Dear  Mrs.  Dash, 

The  little  bib-holder  is  just  lovely  and  so 
very  useful.  Even  at  this  early  stage  I  see 
where  it  will  be  put  into  constant  and  effective 
use. 

I  want  you  so  much  to  come  and  see  us.  If 
I  am  a  bit  proud  of  my  little  one,  I  believe  that 

[  83  ] 


THE    SOCIAL   LETTER 

this  is  a  privilege  granted  to  all  new  mothers, 
and  so  may  be  forgiven. 

Thank  you  so  much  for  your  thoughtfulness. 
Yours  cordially, 

Janet  Grant  Howe. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Harland, 

Acknowl-       How    good    of    you    to    remember    Robert's 
edging  Gift  birthday.     The  pitcher  and  bowl  are  the  de- 
to  Child  iignt  Of  his  iife>     i  know  that  now  his  cereal 
will  taste  so  much  better  than  before. 

Thank  you  so  much  for  your  sweet  thought  of 
my  little  boy. 

With  ever  cordial  regard,  I  am, 

Always  sincerely  yours, 

Janet  G.  Howe. 

Dear  Mrs.  Austin, 

Mary  is  in  the  seventh  Heaven  of  joy  as, 
thanks  to  your  great  kindness,  she  at  last  owns 
a  doll  that  talks.  She  says  that  she  feels  now 
that  she  has  a  real  baby,  and  truly  makes  a 
sweet  little  mother. 

Only  for  the  fact  that  I  am  so  grateful  to 
you  for  giving  my  little  girl  so  much  happiness, 
I  should  want  very  much  to  scold  you  for  your 
extravagance  in  choosing  her  gift. 

Mary's  thanks  are  as  heartfelt  as  are  mine. 

With  kindest  regards,  I  remain, 

Very  sincerely  yours, 

Helen  M.  Wood. 


CHAPTER   IV 
THE  LETTER  OF   CONGRATULATION 

THE  frame  of  mind  is  a  tremendous  factor 
in  all  our  activities.  The  actor  on  the 
stage,  if  he  be  a  true  artist,  lives  his  part, 
whether  joyous  or  tragic.  Looking  at  it  fairly 
it  is  not  deceit  that  he  is  practicing,  —  he  is 
merely  fitting  his  personality  to  the  emotional 
environment  in  which  he  finds  himself  at  that 
particular  time.  The  part  calls  for  tears  — 
he  sheds  them. 

Are  we  not  all  actors  in  this  life's  drama? 
Shakespeare  has  said  it.  Therefore,  let  us  get 
into  our  part.  If  duty  calls  for  expressions  of 
joy,  let  us  "think"  joy,  and  so  give  twofold. 
We,  ourselves,  get  more  out  of  it  in  the  long 
run  on  its  inevitable  rebound.  This  does  not 
mean  going  through  a  stereotyped  set  of  phrases 
laid  out  for  a  specific  occasion. 

Why  make  our  duty  letters  obligatory 
burdens? 

So  the  note  of  congratulation  must  contain 
a  genuine  tone  of  gladness;  it  must  ring  true, 
[  85  ] 


THE    SOCIAL   LETTER 

otherwise  it  were  better  not  to  write  at  all. 
In  many  cases  where  the  person  to  be  con- 
gratulated is  but  a  recent  acquaintance,  the 
visiting  card  with  "heartiest  congratulations" 
is  sufficient. 

In  other  instances,  as  for  the  young  mother, 
the  recovery  from  an  illness,  or  a  wedding 
anniversary,  the  card  is  often  accompanied  with 
flowers  or  book,  etc. 

To  the  bride  one  sends  "the  best  of  good 
wishes,"  never  congratulations;  these  are  re- 
served for  the  groom  when  writing. 

Congratulatory  telegrams  are  addressed  to 
the  newly  wedded  pair,  and  should  be  sent  on 
the  day  of  the  wedding,  to  reach  them  as  soon 
after  the  ceremony  as  possible. 

My  dear  Florence, 

Letter  to       A  little  bird  has  just  told  me  a  wonderful  bit 

Engaged  of  news  which  has  made  me  very  happy  for 

Girl  you.      I    have    not    had    the    pleasure    of   Mr. 

Roberts'  acquaintance,  but  know  that  if  he  is 

your  choice  he  must  indeed  be  all  that  is  good 

and  charming. 

Incidently,  I  think  him  a  mighty  lucky 
fellow,  and  am  only  waiting  the  time  when  I 
can  tell  him  so  in  person. 

All  the  happiness  you  so  richly  deserve  and 
have  helped  others  to  attain,  I  wish  you  most 
heartily. 

[  86  ] 


LETTER    OF    CONGRATULATION 

Hoping  very  soon  to  hear  the  good  news  from 
your  own  lips,  I  am,  with  fond  love, 
Affectionately  yours, 

Janet  V.  Rowe. 


Dear  Florence, 

The  most  joyful  news  that  I  have  heard  for  a 
long  time  was  the  announcement  of  your  en- 
gagement to  George  Roberts.  Knowing  him  as 
well  as  I  do,  I  can't  quite  decide  which  of  you 
is  the  luckier.  I  simply  know  that  each  is  to 
be  congratulated. 

Dear  girl,  I  am  so  very  glad  for  you,  as  I 
realize  how  happy  you  must  be;  knowing  you 
are  so,  makes  me  rejoice  in  your  happiness. 

With  every  good  wish  to  you  both,  believe 
me, 

Fondly  yours, 

Emily. 


My  dear  Travers, 

So  you've  "gone  and  done  it."    I  have  always  Man  to 
claimed   that  there   is   no   such   creature   as   a  his 
"confirmed  bachelor,"  and  you  have  proved  it.  Engaged 

I  have  not  had  the  pleasure  of  meeting  Miss 
Baker,  but  knowing  your  fastidious  taste  and 
discrimination  in  the  fair  sex,  I  am  reassured 
on  that  score. 

Some  day  I  hope  to  meet  the  lady  of  your 
choice,  for  I  know  that  I  shall  find  her  all  that 
is  charming. 

[  87  ] 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

My  heartiest  congratulations  are  yours,  my 
dear  fellow,  on  your  good  fortune. 

Wishing  you  every  kind  of  good  luck,  I  am, 
Sincerely  yours, 

James  F.  Brent. 

My  dear  Saunders, 

For       The  news  of  your  election  as  president  of  our 
Honorary  borough  is  indeed   inspiring,  and  I  am  doubly 
Distinction   glad,  first,  in  the  knowledge  that  we  have  a 
man  at  the  head  in  whom  all  can  trust,  and 
we  know  that  he  will  fulfill  his  mission  with  in- 
tegrity, and  secondly,  because  he  is  my  friend. 
May  your  administration  be  one  of  success 
to  you  in  every  way.     I  know  you  have  the 
hearty  cooperation  of  many  loyal  followers. 
With  sincere  congratulations,  I  am, 
Yours  cordially, 

Horace  Radclif  Cole. 

My  dear  Mr.  Dash, 

Upon  my  return  to  town  I  was  informed  of 
the  great  honor  that  has  been  conferred  upon 
you  in  the  offer  of  the  presidency  of  this  Ameri- 
can Steel  Car  Corporation.  There  is  no  man 
I  know  whom  I  would  rather  see  in  this  posi- 
tion, because  you  have  earned  it  so  squarely. 
Such  material  acknowledgment  of  your  best 
efforts  gives  you  renewed  energy  and  courage. 

My  best  wishes  are  yours  for  continued 
success. 

Yours  sincerely, 

John  F.  McLane. 

[  88  ] 


LETTER    OF    CONGRATULATION 

My  dear  Miss  Blank, 

I  was  more  than  glad  to  hear  the  splendid 
news  of  your  good  fortune,  and  I  only  hope 
that  it  is  but  a  forerunner  of  greater  things. 

As  a  matter  of  fact,  I  was  not  surprised  to 
learn  that  you  had  been  made  head  super- 
visor, for  I  knew  that  with  your  ability,  tact 
and  perseverance,  you  would  eventually  attain 
your  goal.  No  one  is  more  deserving  of  the 
promotion  than  you,  and  I  congratulate  you 
most  heartily. 

Yours  very  sincerely, 

Thomas  Gaunt. 

The  birthday  letter  should  carry  with  it  a  Birthday 
certain  amount  of  tact,  especially  when  written  Letter 
to  one  who  has  many  years  to  her  count,  and 
would  rather  not  count  them!     So  let  us  try 
to  make  the  occasion  one  of  true  rejoicing. 

Dear  Janet, 

To-morrow  will  be  your  birthday  and  a  red- 
letter  day  in  your  calendar.  I  am  only  sorry 
that  so  many  miles  separate  us,  and  that  these 
few  ink  scratches  must  be  my  messenger  in 
wishing  you  very  many  happy  other  birthdays 
to  come. 

As  the  Orientals  have  it,  "May  you  live  a 
thousand  years." 

I  am  sending  you  a  little  gift  by  this  post,  and 
hope  that  it  will  reach  you  in  time  for  the 
celebration. 

[  89  ] 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

With  kind  regards  to  all  at  home  and  much 
love  to  you,  I  am, 

Affectionately  yours, 

Caroline  Judson. 

Dear  Helen, 

Another  little  dot  will  be  added  to  your  small 
score  of  years  by  the  time  this  reaches  you. 
My  heartiest  wishes  are  for  other  and  many 
"dots"  to  come,  under  just  such  happy  aus- 
pices as  this  one  must  be  for  you. 

The  little  gift  I  am  sending  by  this  mail,  will, 
I  hope,  be  of  service  as  well  as  a  token  of  my 
best  wishes. 

With  deep  affection,  I  am, 

Ever  warmly  yours, 

Cecile  Goodson. 

My  dear  Miss  Janet, 

From  Man       I  am  sending  my  few  words  of  congratula- 
te Girl  on  tion  with  this  little  token  to  add  to  the  number 

•    ,%er  °f  happy  reminders  of  your  birthday. 
Birthday       Please  accept  my  heartiest  greeting. 
Yours  sincerely, 

Charles  H.  de  Witt. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Howe, 

On       I  want  you  to  know  that  I  am  thinking  of 
Wedding  you,  and  that  my  heartiest  good  wishes  go  to 
Anniver-  you   and  Mr.  Howe  on  this,  the  tenth    anni- 
sary  versary  of  your  marriage. 

Yours  very  sincerely, 

Janet  F.  Wilsoa 

E  90  ] 


LETTER    OF    CONGRATULATION 

My  dear  Edith  and  James, 

My  heartiest  congratulations  on  the  advent 
of  the  twentieth  anniversary  of  your  marriage. 
You  are  certainly  a  shining  example  of  what  a 
model  couple  should  be! 

With  every  good  wish  for  the  coming  years, 
that  they  may  continue  to  bring  the  joy  and 
blessings  you  both  so  richly  deserve,  I  remain, 
Yours  warmly, 

Edith  Wayne  Dobbs. 

These  little  notes  are  sent  by  hand  with  a  gift  Upon 
of  flowers,  fruit,  book  or  a  small  token.  ^om'a 

Much  tact  is  needed  in  the  writing  of  such  a  mness 
note,  for  one  must  bear  in  mind  that  the  con- 
valescent is  still  weak  and  perhaps  sensitive 
about  mentioning  his  illness.  The  few  words 
must,  therefore,  be  tactful,  in  order  to  convey 
strength  and  courage. 

Dear  Mrs.  Williams, 

Please  accept  these  few  roses  as  a  small  token 
to  express  my  joy  at  your  recovery  from  a  long 
and  tedious  illness.  It  is  indeed  a  glad  bit  of 
news  to  hear  how  rapidly  you  are  convalescing. 

When  you  are  somewhat  stronger,  I  do  hope 
you  will  let  me  come  to  see  you,  if  only  for  a 
few  moments. 

With  every  good  wish  for  renewed  health, 
I  am,  most  cordially  yours, 

Edith  Frayme  Mott. 

[  9i   1 


THE   SOCIAL    LETTER 

My  dear  Miss  Browne, 

Here  is  a  little  book  with  which  to  while  away 
some  of  the  hours  of  your  convalescence.  I 
found  so  much  pleasure  in  reading  it  that  I  am 
giving  it  to  you,  that  you  may  also  enjoy  it. 

I  trust  that  very  soon  you  will  be  well  enough 
to  be  about  as  usual,  and  that  you  will  be  able 
to  look  back  upon  the  dark  days  just  passed  as 
necessary  evils  to  promote  lasting  good. 

With  every  good  wish  for  a  continued  gain  in 
strength,  I  am, 

Yours  very  sincerely, 
Charles  Edward  Howe. 


CHAPTER  V 
THE   LETTER  OF   CONDOLENCE 

ONE  of  the  most  difficult  forms  of  written 
etiquette  is  the  letter  of  condolence.  It 
is  not  so  much  what  to  say  to  the  bereaved,  but 
what  not  to  say  that  is  our  stumbling  block. 
Sympathy  tends  to  render  some  of  us  at  a 
loss  for  words  —  for  the  right  words.  Many 
of  us  feel  the  necessity  of  writing  at  length  to 
express  our  sorrow;  we  desire  to  convey  a 
warmth  of  feeling,  to  give  the  handclasp  of 
encouragement  and  sympathy. 

At  such  a  time  platitudes  irritate,  for  they 
do  not  touch  the  heart.  A  bit  of  homely 
philosophy,  if  you  will,  but  not  in  the  nature  of 
preaching.  The  purpose  of  writing  is  to  try  to 
help  the  bereaved  brave  over  a  soul-rending 
period;  a  time  when  the  need  of  true  friends 
and  their  service  of  love  are  most  required. 

Of  course,  this  has  to  do  with  those  whom 
we  know  intimately;  where  the  person  is  only  an 
acquaintance,  letters  of  condolence  may  seem 
[  93  ] 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

intrusive,  so  a  visiting  card  with  "sincere 
sympathy"  or  "heartfelt  sympathy"  is  all 
that  is  necessary.  Perhaps  a  few  flowers 
sent  with  the  card  would  be  greatly  appre- 
ciated. 

But  it  were  wise  to  face  the  fact  that  the 
letter  of  condolence  is  a  difficult  bit  of  writing 
at  best.  Filling  our  pages  with  empty  senti- 
ments, flowery  quotations  reserved  for  such  sad 
occasions,  leave  the  recipient  unmoved.  Even 
with  our  closest  friends,  we  should  shrink  from 
touching  on  the  other's  grief.  Above  all,  let 
us  not  dilate  upon  the  manner  in  which  the  de- 
ceased died.  Our  letter  must  contain  words  of 
courage  that  will  soothe,  not  wound.  Neither 
let  us  delude  ourselves  by  thinking  that  the 
bereaved  is  too  grieved  to  notice  the  letter,  so 
long  as  we  have  written;  this  is  not  so,  for 
in  many  cases  one's  state  of  mind  is  made 
supersensitive. 

We  should  respect  the  feelings  of  the  person 
to  whom,  we  write,  especially  at  such  a  time. 
Do  not  be  hypocrites;  if  the  loss  happens  to  be 
"for  the  best"  in  every  sense,  do  not  write 
reams  about  "the  great  sorrow  that  is  yours." 
If  the  loss  is  truly  great,  let  us  realize  and  ex- 
press our  sympathy  accordingly. 

All  letters  should  be  sent  immediately  upon 
[  94  ] 


THE   LETTER   OF   CONDOLENCE 

receiving  intimation  of  a  death.  Where  cards 
are  sent  the  bereaved  family  return  an  engraved 
acknowledgment  on  a  black-bordered  card,  a 
few  weeks  after. 

Mourning  stationery  is  most  heavily  bordered  Stationery 
for  a  widow  or  a  widower,  and  is  used  as  long 
as  he  or  she  is  in  deep  mourning.  This  is  de- 
creased with  the  change  of  mourning,  and  all 
stamping  should  be  done  in  black,  as  a  rule, 
only  upon  the  death  of  the  immediate  family, 
including  grandparents. 

As  the  letter  of  condolence  is  always  fol- 
lowed by  a  call,  these  letters  are  generally  ac- 
knowledged verbally  by  the  family  at  that 
time.  But  in  cases  where,  for  instance,  the 
writer  lives  away  from  town,  the  note  is  gen- 
erally answered  by  a  few  words  from  one  of  the 
members  of  the  family. 


MRS.  JAMES  BRENTWORTH  AND  FAMILY 


GBATKFUTX.T  ACKNOWLK1>GK 


YOUR  KIND  EXPHKSSIOX  OF  SYMPATHY 


Acknowl- 
edgment 
Formal 
Card 
Engraved 


Or  cards  may  be  bought  already  engraved 
with  the  names  to  be  filled  in,  as: 
[  95  ] 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 


GRATEFULLY  ACKNOWLEDGE 
(NAME  TO  BK  FH.LJ.D  IN) 


KIND  EXPBESSIOX  OF  SYMPATHY 


Dear  Mrs.  Blank, 

Informal       I  deeply  appreciate  your  note,  and  want  to 
Acknowl-  thank  you  for  your  kind  sympathy.     I  do  not 
edgment  know  any  friendship  I  value  more  than  John's 
and  yours,  and  the  letters  you  both  have  writ- 
ten fill  my  heart  with  gratitude. 

We  are  always  helped  in  time  of  sorrow  by 
words  of  comfort  and  consolation,  and  I  am 
sure  you  understand  how  much  yours  mean  to 
me  at  this  time. 

Thank  you  many,  many  times,  and  let  me 
assure  you  that  your  kindness  will  not  be  for- 
gotten. 

Yours  most  sincerely, 

James  B.  Conrad. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Dash, 

Your  letter  with  its  kind  expressions  of 
sympathy  was  gratefully  received.  It  is  no 
small  measure  of  comfort  to  know  how  greatly 
my  dear  husband  was  beloved  and  respected 
by  all,  as  shown  by  the  many  letters,  including 
yours,  which  I  have  received. 

[  96  ] 


THE   LETTER   OF   CONDOLENCE 

With  many  thanks  for  your  kindness,  I  re- 
main, 

Sincerely  yours, 

Mathilde  Gotham  Wentworth. 


My  dear  Mrs.  Parsons, 

I  have  put  off  acknowledging  your  kind  letter 
of  sympathy  until  I  regained  a  little  strength 
after  my  long  trial.  I  want  to  tell  you  how 
deeply  I  appreciate  your  thought  of  me,  and 
how  much  courage  you  instilled  into  my  dis- 
traught mind  at  a  time  when  I  needed  it  most. 
Believe  me,  I  am  truly  grateful. 

I  expect  to  return  to  town  on  the  fifth  of  next 
month  and  hope  you  will  come  and  see  me 
some  afternoon  shortly  thereafter. 
Yours  sincerely, 

Mathilde  G.  Wentworth. 


My  dear  Mr.  Johnson, 

Thank  you  so  much  for  your  kind  expressions 
of  sympathy.  I  deeply  appreciate  your  offer 
to  be  of  service  to  me  at  this  time,  and,  although 
I  need  not  trouble  you,  it  is  a  great  source  of 
comfort  to  know  that  I  may  call  upon  you 
should  I  have  to  do  so. 

With  gratitude  for  all  your  many  kindnesses, 
I  am, 

Yours  very  sincerely, 

Mathilde  G.  Wentworth. 

[  97  ] 


THE   SOCIAL   LETTER 

My  dear  Mrs.  Dash, 

Letter  of       It  is  with  the  deepest  regret  that  I  hear  of 
Condolence  your  sorrow.     I  realize,  as  only  one  who  has 
upon  gone  through  the  same  sad  experience  can,  just 
Death  of  what  it  means  to  you. 

Close       There  must  be  great  solace  in  the  knowledge 
<e  that  your  dear  husband  leaves  behind  him  many 
who  had  the  honor  of  knowing  him  —  in  love 
and  respect. 

You  have,  dear  Mrs.  Dash,  my  heartfelt 
sympathy. 

Yours  most  sincerely, 

Agatha  H.  Small. 

Dear  Florence, 

I  wish  I  might  be  with  you  at  this  sad  time 
to  better  share  your  great  sorrow. 

If  thoughts  are  as  potent  as  many  say  they 
are,  you  have  mine  for  all  the  strength  and 
courage  to  help  you  in  this  terrible  trial. 

With  deepest  and  sincerest  sympathy,  I  am, 
In  all  love, 

Mabel. 

My  dear  Janet, 

Your  great  sorrow  is  shared  by  very  many  of 
us  who  knew  your  dear  mother  and  the  beauty 
of  her  life.  To  have  had  such  a  parent  is  a 
privilege  accorded,  alas,  to  but  few.  How  much 
more,  then,  must  you,  in  the  days  to  come, 
cherish  a  memory  as  sacred  as  hers  is  to 
you. 

[  98  ] 


THE    LETTER   OF    CONDOLENCE 

If  I  can  be  of  service  in  any  way,  don't  hesi- 
tate to  call  upon  me.  I  should  take  great  com- 
fort in  the  fact  that  I  could  help  you,  if  ever  so 
little,  in  sharing  your  deep  sorrow. 

Yours  in  deepest  sympathy  and  affection, 
Elsie  G.  Banks. 

My  dear  Baker, 

The  news  of  your  great  loss  has  just  come 
to  me.  In  years  past  I  had  the  privilege  of 
knowing  your  sister  and  realize,  therefore, 
your  grief.  Her  many  deeds  of  charity  and 
kindness  stand  as  a  fitting  monument  to  her 
beautiful  life. 

With  profound  sympathy,  I  remain, 
Yours  sincerely, 

Gerald  Du  Bois. 

My  dear  Straight, 

Pray  accept  my  sincerest  sympathy  in  the 
loss  you  have  sustained. 

Sincerely  yours, 

Munroe  R.  Truesdale. 

My  dear  Miss  Rowe, 

At  such  a  time  it  seems  almost  like  intrusion 
to  even  express  my  sympathy  for  you  in  your 
deep  sorrow.  I  want  you  to  know  how  grieved 
I  am  at  your  loss  and  to  assure  you  of  my  warm 
friendship. 

Yours  sincerely, 

James  B.  Forrest. 

[  99  ] 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

My  dear  Miss  Trotwood, 

On       I  have  just  been  told  of  your  Uncle's  death 
Relative  ancj  realize  how  much  of  a  shock  it  must  have 
more  been    to    you.      I   wish  to  tell    you  how    very 
Distant,  grieve(]  both  Mr.  Dash  and  I  are  at  your  loss. 
With  assurance  of  my  regards,  I  am, 
Yours  most  sincerely, 

Amelie  V.  Dash. 

or  Friend  My  dear  Travers, 

I  read  in  the  paper  the  other  day  the  sad 
news  of  James  Cunningham's  sudden  death. 
Knowing  how  closely  associated  you  both 
were,  I  wish  to  express  my  sincere  sympathy  at 
your  loss. 

With  assurance  of  my  regards,  I  remain, 
Sincerely  yours, 

Dent  V.  Conway. 

My  dear  Goodson, 

On       I  was  indeed  shocked  and  grieved  to  read  of 
Material  the  fire  which  destroyed  your  wonderful  stable. 
Loss  I  know  that  no  amount  of  insurance  will  ever 
Loss  of  compensate  you  for  the  death  of  the  horses  you 
Animal  loved  so  dearly,  so  hasten  to  extend  my  sym- 
Pet  pathy  for  what  I  know  must  be  a  great  tribula- 
tion to  you. 

Faithfully  yours, 

Duncan  B.  Smith. 

My  dear  Miss  Dash, 

I  was  so  sorry  to  hear  of  the  loss  by  theft 
of  your  wonderful  miniatures,  knowing  how 

ioo  ] 


THE    LETTER   OF    CONDOLENCE 

greatly  you  prized  them,  and  how  many  years 
of  patient  search  you  expended  in  getting  your 
collection. 

I   am  hoping  that,   with   the   detectives   at 
work,  you  will  soon  be  in  possession  of  them 
once  more;  I  have  great  faith  in  their  success. 
Trusting  to  hear  of  their  recovery,  I  am, 
Cordially  yours, 

Calder  G.  Blackfoote. 

My  dear  Husted, 

I  am  more  sorry  than  I  can  say  to  learn  of 
your  trouble.  I  realize  that  "the  fortunes  of 
war"  offer  poor  philosophy  when  one  gets  hurt, 
but  with  your  youth,  vigor,  and  perseverance, 
I  have  great  hopes  of  a  quick  retrievement 
from  your  present  difficulty. 

If  I  can  be  of  any  service,  I  shall  be  glad  to 
have  you  call  upon  me. 

With  all  good  wishes  for  better  luck,  I  am 
Yours  sincerely, 

David  R.  Upton. 

Dear  Mrs.  Blank, 

There  are  few  words  that  can  adequately  ex-  On 
press  my  very  deep  sympathy  for  you  at  this  So 
time;  while  I  realize  also  the  great  consolation  ~?st .ln 
you  must  have  in  the  fact  that  your  son  died      att  6 
in  the  defense  of  his    country,  with  so  many 
brave  deeds  to  his  count.     It  is  indeed  a  privi- 
lege to  be  the  parent  of  such  a  son. 

Since  the  Greater  Will  decreed  that  he  must 
go  —  how  wonderful  to  die  as  he  did. 


THE   SOCIAL   LETTER 

You    have    the    courage    of    which    Spartan 
mothers  were  made  and  I  know  you  are  sharing 
the  bravery  of  your  beloved  boy  in  accepting 
this  terrible  ordeal  as  befitting  his  mother. 
Yours  in  deepest  sympathy, 

Anthony  R.  Frow. 

My  dear  Gainer, 

You  are  indeed  sharing  the  sorrow  of  many, 
many  parents  whose  sons  have  fallen  in  battle. 
I  had  hoped  that  your  boy  would  have  been 
spared,  but  since  it  was  not  to  be,  I  know  you 
accept  his  loss  with  the  fortitude  he  would 
have  you  show. 

You  have  the  deepest  sympathy  of  many; 
not  only  of  his  friends  here,  but  his  comrades 
in  battle. 

With  sincere  regards,  I  remain, 
Yours  faithfully, 
Donald  S.  White. 


[    102    ] 


CHAPTER  VI 
CLUB   CORRESPONDENCE 

IN  regard  to  this  matter,  a  printed  or  en-  Accepting 
graved  formal  notice  is  sent  to  the  prospec-  Member- 
tive  member,  after  having  been  passed  by  the 
board  or  committee  on  elections.     This  notice 
is  to  be  answered  in  the  following  manner: 

Mrs.  James  Woods 

accepts  with  pleasure 

the  honor  conferred  by  the 

Committee  on  Elections 
to  become  a  member  of  the 

Druid  Club 

and  begs  to  thank  them  for  the 
courtesy  offered 

Or  where  the  answer  is  to  be  sent  to  a  person 
specified  on  the  invitation: 

Mrs.  Robert  Deane, 
40  Murray  Place, 
N.  Edgewood,  Mo. 

Dear  Madam: 

It  is  with  great  pleasure  that  I  accept  the 
kind  offer  of  the  Druid  Club  to  become  a  mern- 

[  103  ] 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

her.  Kindly  extend  to  the  Committee  on  Elec- 
tions my  sincere  appreciation  of  the  honor 
conferred. 

Yours  very  truly, 

Natalie  F.  Rudder. 


or: 

Mrs.  George  F.  Rudder 
having  received  notice  that  the 
Membership  Committee  of  the 

Druid  Club 

has  acted  upon  her  nomination, 

accepts  with  pleasure  their  kind  invitation 

to  become  a  member,  provided  it  does  not  entail 

any  personal  work  or  responsibility, 

other  than  dues 


Among  men,  letters  are  often  sent  to  their 
places  of  business,  sometimes  typewritten  and 
many  times  on  business  paper.  Some  men  have 
two  kinds  of  office  paper  —  the  commercial 
and  the  social,  both  stamped.  The  social 
stationery  will  have  the  address,  but  not 
the  name  of  the  firm  or  occupation,  stamped 
thereon. 

[  104  1 


CLUB    CORRESPONDENCE 

John  Emery,  Esq.,  Secretary. 
Druid  Club, 

North  Edgewood,  Mo. 

Dear  Sir: 

I  am  informed  through  a  notice  sent  by  your 
Committee  on  Elections  that  I  am  now  a  mem- 
ber of  your  club. 

I  wish  to  thank  said  Committee  through  you 
as  secretary,  for  the  courtesy  thus  extended,  and 
say  that  I  accept  with  pleasure. 

Yours  truly, 

Eben  Crane. 

Mr.  Eben  Crane  Refusal 

regrets  that  he  is  unable 
to  accept  the  kind  offer  of  the 
Board  of  Governors  of  the 

Westvale  Club 

to  become  a  member,  owing  to 

his  protracted  absence  from  town 

this  coming  winter 

John  Emery,  Esq., 
Westvale  Club, 
Westvale,  N.  H. 

Dear  Sir: 

Will  you  kindly  convey  my  thanks  to  the 
Board  of  Directors  of  the  Landscape  Gardeners' 
Club  for  their  courtesy  in  nominating  me  for 

[  105  ] 


THE   SOCIAL   LETTER 

membership,  and  express  my  regret  at  my  in- 
ability to  accept  this  honor  at  the  present  time. 
Yours  truly, 

Robert  W.  Quirk. 
Hobert  Graves, 

Secretary  Landscape  Gardeners'  Club, 
Cincinnati,  Ohio. 

Mrs.  Frank  Nash 
regrets  that,  owing  to  absence 
from  town  during  the  winter  months, 

she  is  unable  to  accept  the 
Board  of  Directors'  kind  offer 
to  become  a  member  of  the  Druid  Club, 
but  thanks  them  for  the  courtesy  extended 

Mrs.  Robert  Deane, 
40  Murray  Place, 
N.  Edgewood,  Mo. 

Dear  Madam: 

While  I  greatly  appreciate  the  honor  con- 
ferred upon  me  by  an  election  to  membership 
of  the  Druid  Club,  I  am  obliged  to  deny  myself 
the  pleasure  of  accepting,  owing  to  the  many 
interests  to  which  I  must  give  my  time. 

Kindly  convey  to  the  president  and  members 
of  the  club  my  thanks  for  their  expressions  of 
good-will. 

Yours  very  truly, 

Mary  V.  Blank. 

[  106  ] 


CLUB    CORRESPONDENCE 

This  may  be  sent  in  third-person  form  or  by  Resigning 

a  social   note.     The  former   is  generally   used  £?*? 
.     .  .        '  Club 

when  resignation  is  due  to  some  unpleasantness. 

If,  however,  the  resignation  is  of  an  amiable 
nature,  it  would  be  only  courteous  to  state  the 
reason,  briefly,  in  a  personal  note  to  the  sec- 
retary, to  whom  such  communications  should 
be  sent. 


Mrs.  Joseph  Blank  Formal 

begs  to  extend  to  the 
Board  of  Directors  of  the 

Druid  Club 

her  resignation  as  a  member, 
this  act  to  take  effect  from  the 

date  of  writing 
March  j,  1918 


Mrs.  Robery  Dean,  Secretary, 
40  Murray  Place, 
Edge  wood,  Mo. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Deane, 

I  herewith  beg  to  extend  my  resignation  as  Informal 
member  of  the  Druid  Club,  to  become  effective 
from  above  date,  as  I  intend  leaving  town  for 
an  indefinite  time. 

[  107  ] 


THE    SOCIAL   LETTER 

Kindly  convey  to  the  Board  of  Directors  my 
regrets. 

Yours  very  truly, 

Janet  F.  Duncan. 

In  a  social  letter  written  by  a  man,  the  name 
and  address  of  the  person  to  whom  he  is  writ- 
ing is  put  after  the  signature  at  the  left-hand 
corner.  This  is  less  business-like  than  when  it 
is  at  the  beginning  of  a  letter. 


PRESENTING   FRIEND   FOR  MEMBER- 
SHIP TO  A  CLUB 

A  few  lines  sent  by  a  member  to  the  secre- 
tary of  a  club  to  be  read  at  the  meeting  of  the 
board  is  the  general  rule. 

Mr.  Thomas  Grant,  Secretary, 
60  James  Street, 
Livingston,  Ala. 

My  dear  Mr.  Grant, 

I  beg  to  suggest  Mr.  John  F.  Flower,  General 
Manager  of  the  Sweetster  Carpet  Company, 
as  a  member  of  the  Republic  Club. 

Will  you  kindly  put  his  name  up  for  con- 
sideration at  the  next  meeting  of  the  board? 

I  am  very  glad  to  stand  sponsor  for  Mr. 
Flower,  and  know  you  will  have  no  difficulty 

[  108  ] 


CLUB    CORRESPONDENCE 

in  finding  others  who  will  be  pleased  to  indorse 
my  recommendation. 

Yours  very  truly, 

Emory  H.  James. 

Mrs.  F.  S.  Close, 

Secretary,  Cosmos  Club, 

New  York  City. 
My  dear  Mrs.  Close, 

Mrs.  Arthur  F.  Dwight  of  600  West  Drive 
would  very  much  like  to  become  a  member  of 
our  club,  and  has  requested  me  to  suggest  her 
name  to  the  Committee  on  Elections.  I  am 
more  than  glad  to  do  so,  and  feel  sure  that  she 
would  prove  a  most  valuable  adjunct  to  our 
list  of  members. 

With  regards,  I  am, 

Yours  very  truly, 

Winifred  B.  Vose. 

ACKNOWLEDGING  PRESENTATION  OF 
NAME  TO   CLUB 

My  dear  Trevor, 

Your  note  telling  me  that  you  had  presented 
my  name  to  the  Board  of  Directors  of  the  Sports 
Club  for  membership  is  good  news. 

Many  thanks  for  your  courtesy  and  trouble 
in  my  behalf. 

Yours  faithfully, 

Peter  F.  Kemble. 
Norton  Trevor,  Esq., 
43  Roundville  Place, 

Kensington,  111. 

[  109] 


THE    SOCIAL   LETTER 

My  dear  Mrs.  Smylie, 

Through  your  kindness  I  have  received 
notice  that  I  have  been  elected  a  member  of 
the  Etchers'  Club.  This  courtesy  is  greatly 
appreciated  by 

Yours  sincerely, 

Mabel  F.  Greenstone. 


EXTENDING    HOSPITALITY    OF    CLUB 
TO  FRIEND  FROM  OUT  OF  TOWN 

In  extending  the  hospitality  of  the  club,  the 
friend  gives  a  formal  card,  such  as  is  issued  to 
members,  extending  this  courtesy.  This  card 
must  be  signed  not  only  by  a  member,  but  by 
the  chairman  of  the  house  committee,  when 
the  guest's  name  is  entered  in  the  club  register. 

The  following  are  a  few  letters  such  as  would 
be  written  to  a  friend  inviting  him  to  stay  at 
a  club  while  in  town. 

My  dear  Benson, 

I  am  glad  to  know  that  you  will  arrive  here 
the  day  after  to-morrow,  and,  although  I  shall 
be  out  of  town  when  you  come,  I  wish  to  ex- 
tend to  you  the  hospitality  of  the  Rocking 
Stone  Club  of  which  I  am  a  member. 

I  enclose  a  card,  herewith,  and  I  hope  you 
will  enjoy  the  old  place  as  much  as  I  do. 

[  no  ] 


CLUB    CORRESPONDENCE 

I  shall  lose  no  time  in  looking  you  up  when 
I  return  at  the  end  of  the  week. 
With  all  good  wishes,  I  am, 

Yours  faithfully, 

J.  H.  Stevenson. 
Edward  Benson,  Esq., 
The  Bristol, 
Brayton,  N.  J. 


THE  ROCKING  STONE  CLUB 
NEW   YORK 

January  5,  1918. 
My  dear  Andrews, 

You  will  arrive  in  town  on  Thursday  and  I 
wish  to  be  the  first  to  greet  you.  If  you  are 
not  already  engaged,  come  and  dine  with  me 
here  at  six-thirty  that  evening,  and  I  shall  be 
glad  to  put  you  up  at  this  club  during  your 
stay.  In  any  event,  I  shall  provide  you  with  a 
card  when  I  see  you. 

Hoping  to  have  the  pleasure  of  your  company 
on  Thursday,  I  am, 

Faithfully  yours, 

Edward  V.  Close. 
Captain  George  Andrews, 
The  Bristol, 
Brayton,  N.  J. 

My  dear  Close, 

Many  thanks  for  the  courtesy  in  extending  Acceptance 
me  the  hospitality  of  your  club.     It   is  with 


THE    SOCIAL   LETTER 

great  pleasure  that  I  accept  your  kind  offer  to 
make  it  my  headquarters  while  in  town. 

Hoping  to  see  you  upon  your  return  to  the 
city,  I  am, 

Gratefully  yours, 

George  Andrews. 
Edward  V.  Close,  Esq., 
56  Broadway,  New  York. 


My  dear  Saunders, 

Your  card  extending  the  courtesy  of  the 
club,  together  with  your  kind  note  of  welcome, 
is  gratefully  received.  I  regret,  however,  my 
inability  to  avail  myself  of  your  hospitality,  as 
I  have  already  made  arrangements  to  stay  with 
my  wife's  family  while  in  town. 

Thanking  you,  and  hoping  to  see  you  during 
my  short  stay,  I  am, 

Sincerely  yours, 

Munroe  L.  Upton. 


Letter  of  This  letter  is  sent  by  the  secretary  on  behalf 

Condo-  Of  the   Board   of   Directors,   Committee,   etc., 

'dfathof'a  uPon  a  resolution  voted   at  a  board   meeting 

Member  to  that  effect. 

of  Club  It  can  be  either  formal  or  informal,  accord- 

to  family  m^  tQ  ^Q  standing  of  a  member,  or  the  desire 
of  the  club. 


CLUB    CORRESPONDENCE 

The  President  and  Members  of  the  Formal 

Sports  Club 

beg  to  tender  their  sympathy  to 

Mrs.  James  Ridder  and  family 

for  their  sad  loss 

My  dear  Mrs.  Ridder, 

On  behalf  of  the  president  and  members  of  Informal 
the  Sports  Club,  I  beg  to  tender  to  you  their 
deep    sympathy  for   you    and    yours    in   your 
great  sorrow. 

Yours  very  truly, 

Hyram  B.  Grew, 

Secretary. 

Mrs.  George  Ridder, 
60  York  Place, 

New  Brunswick,  N.  S. 


[   "3  ] 


CHAPTER  VII 
MISCELLANEOUS   LETTERS 

Bon  fT^HE  speeding  of  the  parting  guest  by  letter 
Voyage  J_  js  a  pretty  attention  and  may  be  accom- 
panied or  not  by  a  book,  fruit  or  flowers.  The 
bon  voyage  letter  is  generally  written  when  the 
traveler-elect  goes  by  steamer.  In  sending  such 
a  note  it  is  wise  to  see  that  it  arrives  in  good 
season;  since  time  and  tide  refuse  to  dally, 
steamers,  therefore,  must  needs  sail  on  the 
minute  scheduled. 

The  envelope  should  be  addressed  to  the 
steamer  in  the  following  manner: 

Addressing  Miss  Gertrude  Downe, 

the  On  Board :  S.  S.  Tenadores, 

Envelope  United  Fruit  Company, 

Pier  —  East  River, 

New  York  City. 
My  dear  Miss  Dash, 

I  am  sending  you  these  few  lines  wishing  you 
the  jolliest  of  good  times  on  your  travels,  and  a 
safe  and  happy  return. 

Bon  voyage, 

Sincerely  yours, 
Charles  M.  Deacon. 

[  "4  1 


MISCELLANEOUS    LETTERS 

Dear  Mabel, 

So  you  are  off  for  foreign  shores.  I  wish  I 
might  be  with  you  to  enjoy  all  the  good  times 
I  know  are  in  store  for  you. 

With  best  wishes  for  a  bon  voyage  and  a 
safe  return,  I  am 

Affectionately  yours, 

Edith. 


My  dear  Helen, 

I  am  sending  you  my  thoughts,  with  these  few 
flowers,  to  start  you  on  your  journey.  May  you 
have  the  jolliest  of  times. 

With  all  good  wishes  for  a  bon  voyage,  I  am, 
Warmly  yours, 

Mary  V.  Blake. 


What    is    more    delightful    after    months    of   The 

traveling  than  to  receive  a  letter  of  welcome  by  ^ttfr  °* 
.,       .  /    Welcome 

the  pilot  boat  upon  our  return.     How  eagerly 

we  watch  for  its  approach,  as  leaning  over  the 
railing,  we  see  the  pilot  climb  nimbly  up  the 
wobbly  rope  ladder  on  to  the  deck.  He  is  our 
first  real  contact  with  home  —  a  far  more 
tangible  evidence  than  the  familiar  coast  line 
we  have  been  gazing  at  during  the  past  day. 
Upon  opening  the  mail-bag,  your  letter  should 
be  there  among  the  others,  if  properly  ad- 
dressed, as 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

Miss  Gertrude  Downe, 

At  Quarantine, 

S.  S.  Zacapa, 
United  Fruit  Company, 

New  York  Harbor, 

New  York. 

This  letter  must  also  be  sent  in  ample  time, 
to  insure  its  reaching  the  boat.  So  you  must 
find  out  through  the  steamship  office  direct,  if 
possible,  when  the  vessel  is  due,  rather  than  get 
the  information  through  other  channels. 

Dear  Gertrude, 

Letter  Welcome  to  our  shores  again!  It  is  good  to 
know  that  when  this  reaches  you  that  you  will 
be  but  a  stone's 'throw  from  us. 

I  am  most  anxious  to  see  you  and  hear  of  all 
your  interesting  experiences. 

Let  me  hear  from  you  the  first  minute  you 
can  give  me. 

With  fond  love,  I  am, 

Always  affectionately  yours, 
Emilie  Glover. 

My  dear  Miss  Dash, 

I  wish  I  had  a  pilot's  license,  then  I  could 
come  to  greet  you  in  person.  But  since,  alas, 
I  am  not  qualified  in  such  seamanship,  I  must 
content  myself  with  expressing  on  paper  my 
pleasure  at  your  safe  return. 

[  n6  ] 


MISCELLANEOUS    LETTERS 

Hoping  to   have  the  opportunity  of  seeing 
you  very  soon,  I  am, 

Sincerely  yours, 

Abner  C.  Gruene. 

The  letter  written  by  the  head  of  the  house  Letter  to 


to  the  serving  class  should  always  be  expressed 
in  the  third  person.  This  applies  also  to  petty 
tradesmen.  If,  on  the  other  hand,  the  servant 
has  been  in  the  family  a  number  of  years,  it 
would  be  more  considerate  to  address  her  as 
"My  dear  Mary"  or  "My  dear  Sands,"  and 
sign  the  note  with  the  initial  instead  of  the 
Christian  name,  as  M.  S.  Dash  rather  than 
Mary  S.  Dash. 

In  many  households  the  English  custom  of 
calling  all  servants  by  their  last  name  is  used, 
whether  male  or  female.  So  Mary  Jones  would 
be  known  merely  as  "Jones";  the  same  applies 
to  the  men  servants. 

Mrs.   John   Dash  would  like  Ellen   Smith  to  Formal 
come  to  see  her  on  Tuesday,  January  7,  at  half  Note 
past  ten  o'clock,  with  regard  to  the  position  of 
lady's  maid. 

Mrs.  John  Dash  wishes  the  New  England  Ice 
Company  to  leave  fifty  pounds  of  ice  daily,  begin- 
ning to-morrow,  the  fifteenth;  this  order  to  continue 
until  further  notice. 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

My  dear  Jane, 

Informal  We  expect  to  return  to  town  on  Tuesday 
afternoon  and  will  bring  four  guests  to  stay  over 
the  week-end,  so  please  market  accordingly. 

Also  have  Cramer  meet  us  at  the  station  at 
four-fifteen  with  the  limousine. 

Yours  very  truly, 

M.  S.  Dash. 

My  dear  Sands, 

Kindly  see  that  the  house  is  in  readiness  to 
receive  us  on  Tuesday  next.  We  intend  to  re- 
turn on  the  six-ten  train  from  Jersey  City. 

Have  Cramer  go  down  to  the  station  on  Fri- 
day with  the  motor-truck,  as  I  have  sent  up 
some  furniture,  as  per  list  enclosed;  also  see  that 
the  Packard  is  in  good  condition  as  we  expect 
to  do  much  motoring  upon  our  return. 

Please  be  at  the  station  with  the  Dodge  car, 
and  tell  Ellen  to  have  a  light  supper  for  six,  as 
we  are  bringing  two  guests  with  us. 

Yours  very  truly, 

J.  F.  Closser. 


The  Letter  This  is  given,  if  so  requested,  by  the  head  of 
of  Re  com-  tne  house  to  the  servant  or  employee  upon 
mendation  jeavjng>  jt  were  wjse  to  be  cautious  in  the 

wording  of  this  letter,  for,  in  writing  too  plainly 
derogatory  statements  as  to  the  nature  of  the 
employee,  a  suit  can  be  brought  for  defamation 
of  character.  A  good  point  to  bear  in  mind  is, — 
[  118  ] 


MISCELLANEOUS    LETTERS 

if  we  are  unable  to  say  anything  good,  say 
nothing.  We  must  try  not  to  let  our  personal 
feelings  blind  us  to  other  qualities  that  might 
offset  the  poor  ones  referred  to,  and  thus  prevent 
an  honest  worker  from  obtaining  employment. 

This  is  to  certify  that  Mary  Parsons  has  been  For 
in  my  employ  as   chambermaid   and  waitress  Excellent 
eighteen  months.     During  that  time  I  found  Recom- 
her  most  willing,  honest  and  trustworthy.     I  mendation 
am  very  glad  to  recommend  her  highly. 
E.  C.  Castaigne. 
(Mrs.  Geraud  F.  Castaigne.) 

This  is  to  certify  that  John  Crumpet  has 
been  employed  by  me  as  chauffeur  for  the  past 
two  years.  I  have  found  him  a  careful  driver, 
expert  mechanician,  honest  and  sober. 

J.  B.  Marding. 

If,  on  the  other  hand,  the  servant  or  employee 
has  been  unsatisfactory,  it  would  be  footless 
to  give  him  or  her  a  letter,  since,  if  his  short- 
comings were  stated,  he  would  not  be  apt  to 
use  it.  Nor  should  we  perjure  ourselves,  and 
thus  throw  an  unprincipled  person  upon  an 
unsuspecting  employer.  Faint  praise  is  less 
than  no  praise.  If  the  servant  has  some  fair 
quality,  mention  it  in  the  letter  of  recommenda- 
tion; if  he  has  not  even  that,  it  would  be  better 


THE    SOCIAL   LETTER 

to  refuse  to  write  at  all.  If  further  recom- 
mendation is  asked  by  the  employer-elect,  it 
is  then  time  enough  to  tell  facts,  but  we  must  be 
sure  they  are  facts  and  not  surmises,  in  all  fair- 
ness. If  the  servant  has  been  anything  but 
trustworthy,  it  would  be  better  to  state  this, 
when  asked,  at  the  same  time  remembering 
always  to  be  careful  that  what  we  say  is  ab- 
solutely true. 

If  the  written  recommendation  which  the 
servant  or  employee  takes  with  him  in  seeking 
another  position  is  followed  up,  the  prospective 
employer  telephones  or  writes  for  further  in- 
formation or  confirmation  to  the  ex-employer 
somewhat  in  this  fashion: 

Mrs.  J.  B.  Dash, 

3067  Grand  Avenue, 

Memphis,  Tenn. 

Dear  Madam: 

Letter       Kindly  forgive  my  intrusion,  but  I  am  about 
for  In-  to   engage    as    second    man,  James  Monohan, 
formation  lately  in  your  employ.     I  should  be  very  grate- 
ful if  you   would   let  me  have   any   informa- 
tion you  can  regarding  his  character  and  ability, 
•and  be  assured  that  I  shall  treat  the  matter 
confidentially. 

Yours  very  truly, 

M.  T.  Mayne. 
(Mrs.  Henry  H.  Mayne.) 

[    120    ] 


MISCELLANEOUS    LETTERS 

Mrs.  Henry  H.  Mayne, 

60  Trevort  Street, 

Utica,  N.  Y. 

Dear  Madam: 

In  reply  to  your  communication  of  the  6th  Answer 
inst.,  with  regard  to  James  Monohan,  I  beg  to 
say,  that  while  I  found  him  honest  and  clean,  I 
am  sorry  to  report  that  he  was  not  always  sober, 
and  therefore  not  very  trustworthy  at  those 
times.  He  has  promised  to  stop  drinking,  and 
if  he  does,  I  feel  sure  that  he  will  make  a  very 
good  servant. 

Yours  truly, 

E.  H.  Dash. 


Mrs.  Henry  H.  Mayne, 

60  Trevort  Street, 

Utica,  N.  Y. 

Dear  Madam : 

In  reply  to  yours  of  the  6th  inst.,  I  beg  to 
say  that  I  found  James  Monohan  to  be  a  most 
trustworthy  man.  He  is  a  little  slow  and  hard 
of  hearing,  but,  I  am  sure,  you  will  find  him 
satisfactory  in  every  other  respect,  as  second 
man. 

Trusting  that  this  information  is  satisfac- 
tory, I  remain, 

Yours  truly, 

E.  H.  Dash. 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

Mr.  H.  K.  Rowe, 

608  Rod  ay  Place, 

Cleveland,  Ohio. 
Dear  Sir: 

Asking       May  I  beg  a  moment  of  your  time  to  tell  me 

for  In-  candidly  all  you  know  about  Mr.  Howard  Post. 

formation  I  am  about  to  engage  him  as  clerk  and  would  be 

0$ce  very  grateful  for  any  information  regarding  his 

Work  character  and  ability. 

The  position  is  a  responsible  one,  and,  there- 
fore, I  am  desirous  of  having  a  man  in  whom  I 
can  place  confidence. 

Regretting  to  have  to  trouble  you,  I  am, 
Yours  very  truly, 

H.  E.  House. 

Mr.  H.  E.  House, 

Crayville  Building  Co., 

Seattle,  Wash. 
Dear  Sir: 

Recom-  In  reply  to  your  note  of  inquiry  dated  August 
mendation  II,  it  gives  me  great  pleasure  to  say,  re- 
garding Mr.  Howard  Post,  that,  during  the 
past  six  years  in  which  he  was  employed 
by  us,  we  found  him  to  be  in  every  respect 
worthy  of  our  fullest  confidence,  and  feel  sure 
you  need  have  no  hesitancy  in  engaging  him. 

Were  it  not  for  reorganization  in  our  office,  we 
would  have  been  glad  to  retain  him. 

Yours  truly, 
H.  K.  Rowe, 

President. 

[  122  ] 


MISCELLANEOUS    LETTERS 

Mr.  H.  E.  House, 

Crayville  Building  Co., 

Seattle,  Wash. 

Dear  Sir: 

I   have  your    letter   of   August    n.     Unfor-  Derogatory 
tunately,  I  am  unable  to  say  very  much  regard- 
ing Mr.  Howard  Post.     While  in  our  employ 
his  unpunctuality  and  almost  habitual  inertia 
made  him  very  undesirable  as  clerk. 
Yours  truly, 
H.  K.  Rowe, 

President. 


Mr.  H.  E.  House, 

Crayville  Building  Co., 

Seattle,  Wash. 

Dear  Sir: 

I  would  prefer  to  say  but  little  regarding 
Howard  Post.  It  is  true  that  he  was  employed 
by  us  for  over  a  year  as  clerk.  He  has  many 
good  qualities,  but  few  that  I  found  compatible 
with  good  clerkship. 

Regretting  I  am  unable  to  furnish  you  with 
a  better  report,  I  remain, 

Yours  truly, 

H.  K.  Rowe, 

President. 

It  is  decidedly  not  "good  form"  to  ask  for  a  The  Letter 

letter  of   introduction;   this    should   come   un-  of  Intro- 

solicited    through    a    kind    friend    who    knows  UCH 
[   123  1 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

your  need.  This  note  should  be  written  in 
social  form,  enclosed  in  an  envelope  addressed 
to  person  to  whom  the  introduction  is  made, 
—  not  to  the  one  introduced,  and  left  unsealed. 
It  should  be  cordial  in  tone. 


My  dear  Mrs.  Dash, 

This  will  introduce  to  you  Miss  Mabel 
Coventer  of  Trenton,  New  Jersey,  who  intends 
staying  in  your  delightful  city  during  the 
winter  months. 

I  would  be  so  appreciative  of  any  attention 
you  would  kindly  show  her.  I  am  sure  you 
will  find  her  charming. 

With  warmest  regards  to  you  all,  I  remain, 
Most  sincerely  yours, 

Janet  F.  Rowe. 


My  dear  Travers, 

I  wish  to  introduce  the  bearer  of  this  note, 
Mr.  James  Duncan,  who  intends  stopping  in 
your  city  for  some  months.  He  is  the  man- 
ager of  the  Western  Celluloid  Company  of  Los 
Angeles.  Knowing  your  interest  in  the  firm,  I 
feel  that  you  should  become  acquainted. 

Appreciating  any  favor  you  will  be  able  to 
show  Mr.  Duncan,  I  remain,  with  kind  re- 
gards, 

Sincerely  yours, 

Joseph  Cathaway. 

[  124  ] 


MISCELLANEOUS    LETTERS 

My  dear  Commissioner  Walton, 

This  note  will  introduce  to  you  one  of  our 
ablest  and  most  respected  citizens,  Mr.  Thomas 
Eagers. 

Mr.  Eagers  has  for  a  long  time  been  greatly 
interested  in  shipping  problems,  both  in  this 
country  and  abroad,  and  has  made  a  wide 
study  of  conditions.  He  has  much  informa- 
tion of  value,  culled  from  his  long  sojourn 
in  the  Orient,  as  representative  for  the  Ohio 
and  Western  Transportation  and  Import  Com- 
pany. 

I  am  sure  you  will  be  interested  in  each  other, 
and  am  glad  to  be  the  means  of  thus  bringing 
you  together. 

The  trout  are  plentiful  in  our  streams  and 
I  shall  be  glad  to  get  word  that  you  will  come 
out  again  to  us  and  have  a  try  at  them. 

With  cordial  greetings  to  Mrs.  Walton, 
I  am, 

Yours  sincerely, 

Ebner  Harrison. 


The  letter  of  introduction  may  be  delivered 
personally,  or  mailed  enclosed  in  another  en- 
velope, with  card  inside.  Then  the  recipient 
will,  or  should,  call  at  the  earliest  opportunity 
or  acknowledge  the  letter.  If  he  is  a  member 
of  some  club,  he  might  put  you  up  there,  besides 
showing  other  courtesies. 
[  125  ] 


THE   SOCIAL   LETTER 

Visiting-       Often   the   visiting  card    with  "Introducing 
card  for  Miss  Blank"  written  at  the  top,  is  quite  cor- 

ntr°tion  rect  *or  a  Person  with  whom  we  are  but 
slightly  acquainted.  This  is  more  usual  in 
business  than  in  social  roles.  The  introduc- 
tory card  is  presented  in  person. 

Begging  The  begging  letter  for  charity,  in  order  to  be 
Letter  for  effective,  must  make  its  appeal  strong.  In 
'  almost  all  big  organizations  for  charitable  pur- 
poses, the  letters  are  typed  or  multigraphed 
on  official  letter-head  paper.  We  are  not  con- 
cerned with  such  here.  What  we  are  interested 
to  know  is  how  to  write  a  personal  letter  in 
such  a  cause.  It  is  written  like  other  social 
notes,  —  by  hand  on  social  paper,  somewhat  in 
the  following  manner: 


My  dear  Mrs.  Grey, 

Knowing  how  very  much  interested  you  are 
in  many  worthy  charities,  I  am  writing  this 
little  appeal  as  a  further  call  upon  your 
bounty. 

We  are  endeavoring  to  raise  fifty  thousand 
dollars  toward  a  summer  home  for  small  wage 
earners  where,  for  three  or  four  dollars  a  week, 
they  may  have  nourishing  food,  good  air  and 
proper  attention  during  their  meagre  vacation, 
thus  helping  build  'them  up  through  the  months 
to  come. 

[  126  ] 


MISCELLANEOUS    LETTERS 

We  have  been  promised  ten  thousand  dollars, 
if  we  are  able  to  raise  the  other  forty  thousand 
within  three  months,  and  you  can  see  how 
anxious  we  are  to  fulfil  the  terms  of  this  gener- 
ous offer. 

Will  you  not  help  us  by  contributing,  no 
matter  how  small  the  sum,  toward  our  work? 

Hoping  to  hear  from  you  favorably,  I  am, 
Yours  very  sincerely, 

Amelia  G.  Bounde. 

In  sending  letters  like  the  above,  it  is  far 
better  to  have  some  printed  pamphlets  telling 
in  detail  the  nature  and  outline  of  the  work, 
together  (and  this  is  very  important)  with  a 
list  of  names  of  the  committee  or  those  in- 
terested. Names  have  much  weight  in  such 
matters. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Dash, 

We  are  asking  our  friends  to  help  us  raise 
fifty  thousand  dollars  toward  a  summer  home 
for  small  wage  earners,  and  I  have  put  your 
name  at  the  head  of  my  list,  knowing  your 
great  interest  in  the  working  class.  I  do  so 
hope  that  we  may  count  on  having  a  contribu- 
tion from  you,  no  matter  how  small,  to  help 
us  carry  on  this  so  much  needed  home  to  a 
happy  completion. 

With  kindest  regards,  I  am, 

Cordially  yours, 
Cecile  F.  Trevort. 

[  127  ] 


THE    SOCIAL   LETTER 

My  dear  Mrs.  Trevort, 

Affirmative  I  am  enclosing  herewith  my  check  for  fifty 
Reply  dollars  as  my  contribution  toward  your  worthy 
work  in  raising  funds  for  a  summer  home  for 
small  wage  earners,  and  trust  that  you  will 
meet  with  every  success  in  getting  the  amount 
necessary. 

With  all  good  wishes,  I  am, 

Cordially  yours, 

Mary  F.  Dash. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Trevort, 

You  may  put  me  down  for  two  hundred  and 
fifty  dollars  as  my  contribution  toward  your 
home  for  small  wage  earners.  This  sum  I 
agree  to  pay  by  the  first  week  in  January  of 
the  coming  year.  . 

Wishing  you  all  success,  I  am, 

Yours  very  sincerely, 
Ethel  V.  Dowd. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Trevort, 

Refusal  I  regret  exceedingly  that  I  am  unable  to  help 
you  in  raising  the  sum  necessary  for  the  home 
for  small  wage  earners.  Unfortunately,  there 
have  been  so  many  demands  upon  my  purse  at 
this  time,  that  I  feel  I  must  confine  all  my 
efforts  to  the  charities  in  which  I  have  a  per- 
sonal interest. 

Regretting  my  inability  to  help,  I  remain, 
Yours  sincerely, 

Katherine  Sweete. 

[  128  ] 


MISCELLANEOUS    LETTERS 

My  dear  Mrs.  Trevort, 

I  am  so  sorry,  but  heavy  demands  upon  my 
purse  preclude  my  adding  any  further  charity 
to  my  already  long  list. 

Wishing  you  all  success  in  your  work,  be- 
lieve me, 

Sincerely  yours, 

Martha  B.  Greene. 

At  a  public  function  or  charity,  a  list  of  pa-  To  Act  as 
trons  or  patronesses  is  a  very  necessary  factor  Patron  or 
toward  making  it  a  success. 

The  patroness  is  generally  chosen,  first,  for 
the  weight  and  importance  her  name  lends, 
and  secondly,  because  he  or  she  is  expected,  by 
accepting  to  act  in  this  capacity,  to  subscribe 
largely,  in  any  event,  taking  not  less  than  ten 
dollars'  worth  of  tickets  for  the  performance. 

The  committee  on  entertainment,  or  chair- 
man, sends  an  engraved  invitation  or  personal 
letter  asking  for  this  privilege.  The  note  would 
read  somewhat  as  follows : 

Mrs.  Dudley  Stagg, 

Mt.  Kisco,  New  York. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Stagg, 

We  are  giving  a  concert  for  the  benefit  of 
the  Blind  Babies'.  Association  which  will  be 
held  on  Tuesday  evening,  March  the  sixth,  at 
the  Imperial,  and  would  very  greatly  appre- 

[  129  ] 


THE   SOCIAL   LETTER 

ciate    being    allowed    to    use    your    name    as 
patroness. 

I  am  enclosing  five  tickets  which  I  hope  you 
will  be  able  to  use. 

Trusting  to  hear  from  you  favorably,  I  am, 
Sincerely  yours, 
Edith  G.  Traut, 

Chairman. 

Kindly  send  check  to  Mrs.  G.  Daigne,  652 
West  76th  Street,  and  make  it  payable  to  her 
order. 


Frank  R.  Gregory,  Esq., 
1 20  Broadway, 

New  York. 

My  dear  Mr.  Gregory, 

We  are  giving  a  special  performance  of 
"The  Gods  Provide"  for  the  benefit  of  the 
widows  and  children  of  miners,  to  be  held  at 
the  Criterion  on  Tuesday  afternoon,  May  the 
fourth,  at  three  o'clock.  Will  you  kindly  allow 
us  to  use  your  name  as  patron  on  this  occasion? 

I  am  enclosing  six  tickets  which  I  hope  you 
will  be  able  to  use. 

All  checks  are  to  be  made  to  the  order  of 
Graham  F.  Lightfoote,  Treasurer,  and  sent  to  me. 

Trusting  you  will  grant  us  the  privilege  of 
having  you  on  our  list,  I  am, 

Sincerely  yours, 

Marion  B.  Cross. 
(Mrs.  Francis  R.  Cross.) 

[  130  ] 


MISCELLANEOUS    LETTERS 

Mrs.  C.  V.  Traut, 

50  Midvale  Terrace, 

Mt.  Kisco,  New  York. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Traut, 

I  beg  herewith  to  enclose  my  check  for  ten  Acceptance 
dollars  in  payment  for  the  five  tickets  sent  for 
your  benefit  for  the  Blind  Babies'  Association. 
I  shall  be  very  glad  to  have  you  use  my  name 
as  patroness  at  that  time. 

Wishing  you  all  success,  I  am, 

Yours  very  truly, 

Muriel  B.  Stagg. 

Mrs.  S.  F.  Weekes, 
York  Turning, 

Poughkeepsie,  N.  Y. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Weekes, 

It  is  with  much  pleasure  that  I  lend  my  name 
as  patron  at  your  special  performance  for  the 
widows  and  children  of  miners  and  enclose 
my  check  for  fifty  dollars  herewith  for  a  box. 

With  sincere  good  wishes  for  your  success, 
I  am, 

Yours  very  truly, 

Thomas  E.  Maderon. 

Mrs.  S.  F.  Weekes, 
York  Turning, 

Poughkeepsie,  N.  Y. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Weekes, 

In  response  to  your  note  asking  me  to  act  as 
patroness  at  the  benefit  performance  on  Tues- 

[  131   ] 


THE   SOCIAL   LETTER 

day,  March  the  fourth,  I  beg  to  say  that  I  shall 
be  very  glad  to  do  so,  provided  it  does  not  en- 
tail other  responsibility  than  purchasing  two 
tickets,  for  which  I  enclose  my  check. 
Yours  very  truly, 

Judith  F.  Hopkins. 

Mrs.  S.  F.  Weekes, 
York  Turning, 

Poughkeepsie,  N.  Y. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Weekes, 

Refusal  In  reply  to  your  note  of  the  thirteenth  in- 
stant, asking  me  to  act  as  patroness  at  the  bene- 
fit for  the  widows  and  children  of  miners,  I  beg 
to  say  that  I  prefer  not  to  give  my  name,  but 
enclose  my  check  for  five  dollars,  as  a  small 
donation  toward  your  work. 

Thanking  you  for  the  courtesy  extended,  I  am, 
Yours  truly, 

Evelyn  F.  Grost. 

My  dear  Mrs.  Weekes, 

I  regret  I  am  unable  to  accept  your  kind  in- 
vitation to  act  as  patroness  for  the  benefit 
held  on  the  sixth  of  March,  and  beg  to  return 
the  five  tickets  sent. 

Thanking  you  for  the  courtesy  of  asking  me, 
Yours  truly, 

Margaret  F.  Doe. 

The  Child's       How  great  the  task  of  setting  a  young  child 
Letter  down    to   write    a    duty    letter.      Fortunately, 
[  132  ] 


MISCELLANEOUS    LETTERS 

there  are  few  obligations  imposed  upon  the  little 
one,  but  the  few  are  the  thorns,  not  only  for 
him,  but  for  the  parent  who  stands  by  to  see 
that  he  says  the  right  thing. 

A  few  very  simple  phrases  are  here  set  down 
to  suggest  an  idea  or  so.  They  should  not  be 
used  if  the  child  has  any  idea  of  his  own,  but 
are  placed  in  the  following  lines  to  help  the 
little  one  whose  pen  or  pencil  is  in  no  way  a 
staff,  but  a  stick,  to  be  hurled  to  the  farther- 
most corner  of  the  room. 

Dear  Auntie  Mabel, 

Thank  you  very  very   much   for  the  dolly.    The  Letter 
I  think  she  is  beautiful  and  I  am  very  happy  Of 
to  have  her  come  to  stay  with  me.  Thanks 

Mamma  says  I  must  be  very  careful  of  her, 
so  that  she  will  keep  pretty  a  long  time.  I  will 
be  good  to  her  as  I  love  her  very  much. 

Please  come  soon  and  see  me, 

Your  loving  little  niece, 
Marjorie. 

Dear  Uncle  John, 

Thank  you  very  much  for  the  box  of  sol- 
diers. I  like  them  best  of  all  my  birthday 
presents,  and  I  am  going  to  play  war  and  fight 
my  battleship  against  them. 

Please  come  soon  and  play  with  me, 
Your  loving  nephew, 

Teddie. 

[  133  ] 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

Dear  Grandma, 

On  a       I   wish  you   many  many  happy   returns   of 
Birthday  your  birthday.     I  hope  you  are  quite  well  and 
have  a  birthday  cake  with  candles  on  it. 

Your  loving  grandchild, 

Edith. 

Dear  Grandpa, 

I  hope  you  are  having  a  very  happy  birthday 
and  that  you  have  received  lots  of  nice  presents. 
I  have  sent  a  surprise  to  you,  but  you  must  not 
guess  what  it  is  until  you  get  it.  It  is  big  and 
fat  and  soft,  —  but  I  won't  tell  you  any  more. 
Your  loving  grandson, 

Peter. 

French  French  is  a  language  that  lends  itself  to 
Mode  of  grace  of  expression.  It  has  six  pretty  ways  of 
Address-  -  , .  TV  T  r 

•     an(i  paying  a  compliment  to  our  one.     Many  of  us 

Closing  are  familiar  with  the  language  and  write  it 
Letters  fluently,  but  pause  at  the  proper  closing  salu- 
tation to  a  letter.  The  body  of  the  letter  is 
easily  written,  but  we  often  puzzle  over  just 
what  words  to  use  to  express  the  right  amount 
of  warmth  or  cordiality. 

In  Some  make  the  mistake  of  addressing  a  per- 

Addressing   son  as  m  English,  using  the  pronoun.     This  is 
redundant,   for   Chere   Madame  or  Cher  Mon- 
sieur,   etc.,    is    sufficient.      Never    abbreviate 
Madame,    Monsieur,    Mademoiselle   unless    the 
[  134  1 


MISCELLANEOUS    LETTERS 

name  is  added.    "Dear  Sir"  or  "Dear  Madam" 
has  its  equivalent  in  Monsieur  or  Madame. 

In  mentioning  a  relative  to  one  with  whom 
an  intimate  acquaintance  is  not  established, 
we  generally  write:  Monsieur  votre  Oncle, 
Madame  votre  Mere,  etc.  Officers  and  other 
men  of  military,  naval  or  state  titles  are  ad- 
dressed as:  Monsieur  le  Commandant,  Monsieur 
le  Commissionaire,  Monsieur  UAmiral,  Mon- 
sieur le  Maire,  etc. 

There   are   many   variations   to   express   the  Concluding 
same  sentiment,  as  was  said  above.    The  word    a  Letter 
recevez    implies    a   condescension    unless    it    is 
followed   by   a   very   cordial    phrase.     Except 
to   an  inferior,   it  is  better   to  use  the   word 
agreer. 

To  begin  with  the  most  distant  and  formal   Yours 
of  endings :  Truly 

Recevez  Monsieur  (Madame]  Expression  de 
mes  sentiments  distingues. 

Recevez  Monsieur  (Madame)  mes  salutations. 

Recevez  Monsieur  (Madame]  mes  civilites. 

Recevez  Monsieur  (Madame]  ^assurance  de 
ma  haute  consideration. 

Je  vous  prie  d'etre  assure  de  mes  meilleurs  sen-  Yours 
timents.  Very  Truly 

Je  vous  prie  d* agreer  mes  salutations  empressees. 

Croyez  a  mes  bons  sentiments  pour  vous. 
[  135  ] 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

Yours       Soyez  certaine  de  V assurance  de  mes  meilleurs 
Sincerely  sentiments. 

Croyez  a  mes  sentiments  ,devoues. 
(Gentleman  to  lady)  Feuillez,  Madame,  rece- 
voir  I* expression  de  tout  mon  respect. 

Lady  in  answer  —  Agreez,  cher  Monsieur, 
U  expression  de  mes  sentiments  d'amitie. 

Daignez  agreer,  Madame,  mes  meilleurs  sou- 
venirs et  mes  vceux  les  plus  sinceres  pour  votre 
succes. 

Yours  Very       Recevez,  cher  Monsieur,  de  ma  part  une  cor- 
Sincerely  foale  poignee  de  main,  or   une  bonne  poignee  de 
r    Yours  main. 
Cordially         „ . 

Bien  a  vous. 

Tout  cordialement  a  vous. 

Je  suis  de  cceur,  votre  tout  devoue. 

Je  suis  tout  a  vous. 

Chere  Madame,  je  vous  baise  la  main. 
Yours       Recevez,    chere   Madame,    avec   mes   remercie- 
Gratefully  ments,  V assurance  de  ma  gratitude  infinie. 

Je  vous  prie  d'agreer  mes  salutations  et  mes 
remer  dements. 

Yours  Re-       Recevez,  Monsieur,  r  expression  de  mon  profond 
spectfully  respecL 

Yours       Feuillez  recevoir,  Madame,  mes  homages  respec- 
Faithfully  tuex. 

Yours  Affec-       Feuillez  recevoir,  chere  Suzanne,  V expression 
tionately  fo  ma  p[us  v{ve  am{tie. 

[   136  ] 


MISCELLANEOUS    LETTERS 

Je  ?  embrasse  affectueusement. 
Ton  tout  devoue. 

Je  suis  de  cceur,  votre  tout  devoue. 
Jean  s'unit  a  moi  pour  t'envoyer  a  tons  ses 
bonnes  amities. 


[   137  ] 


CHAPTER  VIII 
MODE  OF  ADDRESS 

For    IT^ORMS  for  addressing  envelopes  are  gov- 
Women    Jj     erned  by  a  few  accepted  rules.     For  in- 
stance, —  a  married  woman  is  addressed  by  her 
husband's  name,  even  after  his  death,  except 
where  two  women  in  the  family  have  the  same 
name.    As,  for  example,  a  mother  and  daughter- 
in-law.     The  son  has  the  same  name  as  his 
father  with  Jr.  added.     At  the  father's  death 
he  drops  the  Jr.,  and  so  both  married  women 
Two  have  the  same  name,  which  often  is  very  awk- 
Women  warci.    Jf  tne  widow  wishes,  she,  in  such  a  case, 
with  Same  111-1  •  j          r 

Name  ma^  ta^e  ner  baptismal  name  to  avoid  confu- 
sion, so,  where  she  was  formerly  known  as 
"Mrs.  Henry  Dash"  she  may  now  sign  herself 
"Mrs.  Grace  Dash." 

Divorced       With  the   divorced  woman   it  is   otherwise. 

Woman  Unless  the  courts  allow   her  the    privilege  of 

using  her  maiden  name  again,  should  she  desire 

to  do  so,  she  takes  her  baptismal  name.    Prior 

to  her  divorce  she  was  known  as  "Mrs.  James 

Tooker  Blaine,"  after,  as  "Mrs.  Blanche  Garrick 

(her  maiden  name)  Blaine."    Her  status  is  then 

tacitly  established  and  thus  she  avoids  any  un- 

[  138  ] 


MODE   OF   ADDRESS 

pleasantness  or  confusion  if  her  ex-husband 
should  marry  again  and  there  would  be  two 
"Mrs.  James  Tooker  Blaines." 

In  writing  to  a  stranger  or  in  a  business  letter,  Business 
the  woman  always  signs  her  name  to  the  letter  Signature 
thus: 

Christian  name     Maiden  name     Married  name 
Margaret  Meadows  Johnson 

or  her  initials  to  the  Christian  and  maiden  name, 
always  writing  her  married  name  in  full.  Under 
this  signature  she  may  add  in  brackets  the 
name  by  which  she  is  addressed  as: 

Margaret  Meadows  Johnson 
or 

M.  M.  Johnson 

{Mrs.  John  W.  Johnson} 

She  must  never  use  as  part  of  the  signature  the 
prefix  "Mrs."  or  "Mr."  It  is  the  height  of  bad 
form.  In  all  social  correspondence  the  woman 
always  uses  her  full  name,  never  just  the  initials. 

A  woman  never  uses  her  husband's  official  Husband*. 
title  as,  "Mrs.  Dr.  James"  or  "Mrs.  Justice  Official 
Smith,"  no  matter  what  his  rank  may  be.     She 
has  merely  the  right  to  "Mrs.  Henry  Smith"  or 
"Mrs.  George  James."    Even  though  the  hus- 
band happens  to  be  the  highest  executive  of 
state,  this  form  holds. 

[  139  ] 


THE    SOCIAL   LETTER 

Title  for       If  she  has  gained  a  title  of  her  own  she  may, 

"*fg  of  course,   use  it.     If,   for    instance,   she    is    a 

physician,  she  would  use  her  name  thus,  "Dr. 

Mary  Stevens."     In  this   instance  she  would 

not  use  her  husband's  Christian  name. 

Unmarried       In  writing  a  business  letter  the  unmarried 

Women  WOman,    where    she    is    not    known,    may    put 

"Miss"  in  brackets  before  her  signature,  lest 

she  be  addressed  as  "Mrs.,"  as  "(Miss)  Eleanor 

Towne." 

Men  In  England  it  is  the  custom  always  to  use 
Esq.,  or  less  frequently  "  Esqr."  for  all  social 
correspondence,  or  to  professional  men,  instead 
of  "Mr." 

This  custom  is  followed  to  a  great  extent  in 
America. 

Social  notes  should  be  addressed: 
John  Growton,  Esq. 

Business  notes  should  be  addressed : 
Mr.  John  Growton 

Tradesmen  notes  should  be  addressed: 
John  Growton 

Jr.  and  Sr.       Some  believe  that  if  the  name  has  Jr.  or  Sr. 
attached,  Mr.  or  Esq.  need  not  be  used.    Logi- 
cally, this  does  not  hold,  for  either  Sr.  or  Jr. 
is    part  of  the   signature   and   can   hardly  be 
[  HO  ] 


MODE   OF    ADDRESS 

considered  a  title.  Therefore  James  Duncan, 
Jr.,  Esq.,  or  Mr.  James  Duncan,  Jr.,  is  really 
the  more  correct  form.  In  many  cases  Sr.  is 
omitted,  since  in  its  omission  lies  the  fact  of 
senior  being  understood.  Jr.,  however,  is 
always  used  until  the  death  of  the  senior  of  the 
same  name. 

Titles  of  physicians,  professors,  clergy,  titles  Official 
by  courtesy,  and  of  those  holding  public  office   Titles 
are    generally    abbreviated    on    the    envelope 
and  at  the  heading  of  a   letter,  except  when 
extremely  formal.     Esq.  or   Mr.  is   never  used 
in  connection  with  any  titles  whatsoever  in  the 
above  cases. 

But  where  one  addresses  "My  dear  Doctor" 
or  "My  dear  Professor,"  then  the  title  is  written 
in  full.  This  form  is  not  affected  in  formal  notes, 
as  it  is  more  courteous  to  write  title  and  name 
as,  "My  dear  Doctor  James"  or  "My  dear 
Professor  Duncan."  In  less  formal  notes  these 
titles,  when  the  name  is  added,  may  be  abbre- 
viated, but  never  in  formal  invitations. 

All   officers   above    the    grade    of    lieutenant  Officers  of 

should  be  addressed  by  their  titles  and  rank  as,  the  Army 

and  Navy 

General  Henry  F.  Wood 

Adjutant  General 
United  States  Army 


THE    SOCIAL    LETTER 

and  should  receive  the  written  salutation  in 
formal  communications,  "Sir;"  in  informal, 
"Dear  General  Wood."  The  word  "General" 
should  not  be  abbreviated. 

War  Office  James  F.  Pointer,  Esq., 

General  in  Command  of 
The  Army  of  the  United  States 
or: 

James  F.  Pointer 
The  Commanding  Officer 
2pth  Infantry 

It  is  a  general  rule  in  the  Army  and  Navy 
that  envelopes  addressed  to  officers  of  both 
services  should  be  written  with  their  proper  title. 
A  lieutenant  is  generally : 

Mr.  J.  G.  Smith 

Lieutenant  nth  Regiment 
United  States  Infantry 

He  is  spoken  of  as  Mister, — "  My  dear  Mr. ." 

A   Commander   in   the   Navy   is   sometimes 

called   by  courtesy,  "Captain,"   although   the 

envelope  is  addressed,  "Commander." 

Foreign       An    Ambassador    is    addressed    formally    as 

Legation  "His  Excellency"  or  "The  Hon.  Mr.  Greene." 

The  Eon.  Rufus  Greene 
Ambassador  to  Finland 

[  142  ] 


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Hon.  or  Honorable 
James  Doe, 
Secretary  of 
Interior,  etc. 

Senator  Thomas  F. 
Gilt  or  Honorable 
Thomas  F.  Gilt 

Honorable  James 
P.  Turner 

Mr.  Justice  M.  Greene, 

The  Hon.  M.  Greene, 
Justice  of  Supreme 
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Governor  John  F. 
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THE    SOCIAL   LETTER 


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o  His  (Her)  Grace, 
the  Duke  of 
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[   145 


THE    SOCIAL   LETTER 


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James  Grey, 
To  the  Right 
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Right  Honorable  the 
Earl  of  Kent 
Countess  of  Kent 

Right  Honorable 
Viscount 
(Viscountess)  Grey 
or 
To  Viscount  Grey 
To  Viscountess  Grey 

Right  Honorable  the 
Baron  Whiteside, 
The  Right 
Honorable  the 
Baroness  Whiteside 

To  the  Honorable 
James  Warwick, 
To  the  Honorable 
Mrs.  Warwick 

To  the  Honorable 
Miss  Grey 

To  Sir  James  Grey,  Bart. 
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[  147  ] 


UCSOUTHERN 


UBRAflYFAQUTY 


°00  021  570   7 


